Wicked Charms (Lizzy and Diesel 3) - Page 5

Josh nodded. “Speaking in coroner after hours wouldst be a bummer.”

“It seems like an odd occupation,” I said to Nergal. “Why did you become a coroner?”

“I was in debt after med school and this opportunity happened along. I know it seems gruesome to the average outsider, but it’s really very interesting work. Why did you become a baker?”

“I flunked gravy when I was in culinary school, but I was good at making cupcakes.”

I felt someone lean into me, and a long arm reached out for the breadbasket. I recognized the arm. It belonged to Diesel. He scraped a chair up to the table and positioned himself between Nergal and me.

“So what’s new?” Diesel said, giving my ponytail a playful tug.

I was momentarily dumbstruck.

“Where the heck were you?” I said to him. “One minute you were in my house and then next thing you were gone. For all I knew you were dead. I haven’t heard a word from you in weeks. You didn’t even say goodbye.”

“I was on a job. And I’m pretty sure I said goodbye.”

“The last thing you said to me was ‘I’ll be back.’?”

“And?”

“?‘I’ll be back’ is not ‘goodbye.’?”

Diesel took a roll from the breadbasket. “This is why I don’t work with women.”

“You do work with women. I’m a woman.”

“Yeah, but I have no choice. I only had two options and Wulf snagged option number one. He got to Steven Hatchet first.”

I thunked my forehead with the heel of my hand. “Unh!”

Steven Hatchet is the only other person with the ability to recognize a disguised stone. It’s sort of insulting that Diesel would consider Hatchet to be the number one choice since Hatchet is flat-out nuts. He looks like an underbaked dinner roll with legs. He has scraggly red hair, is around my age, and thinks he’s a medieval minion, serving his liege lord Wulf.

“You’re crowding the table,” I said to Diesel. “This table only has room for four.”

“You’re bummed, right?” Diesel said.

“Yes! Go away.”

The waitress returned with our drinks and asked if we wanted to order food.

Glo ordered a burger, Josh ordered fried clams, Nergal ordered a lobster roll, and I ordered rice pudding.

“I’ll have a lobster roll, too,” Diesel said.

“No, he won’t,” I said to the waitress. “He’s not with us.”

“He’s sitting with you,” the waitress said.

“He’s a squatter,” I said. “Don’t encourage him.”

The waitress gave him a full body scan. “If it was me I’d totally encourage him.”

“I’ll have a beer with my lobster roll,” Diesel said.

“No, he won’t,” I said.

“What kind of beer do you want?” the waitress asked Diesel.

Tags: Janet Evanovich Lizzy & Diesel Mystery
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