“You have to do it, Perry. You need to be still—”
He was gone, across the room in a few strides. He stopped in front of the wallscreen and dropped to his knees. Aria didn’t think. She went to him, wrapping her arms around him. Perry cinched her into his own arms, uttering a strangled sound as he buried his head into her neck. His body was a tight coil of pain around her, his tears cool feathers on her skin.
Chapter 30
PEREGRINE
Aria guided him upstairs and pulled him into her room. Perry had a vague thought that maybe he shouldn’t be there, but his feet never slowed. He walked in and sat heavily on the bed. Aria turned on the lamp, keeping the light dim. Then she sat beside him and wove her fingers through his.
Perry flexed the fingers of his wounded hand. The surge of pain felt reassuring.
He was still there.
He could still feel.
“Talon didn’t look harmed,” he said after a while. “He looked all right. ”
“He did. ” She bit her lip, frowning in thought. “I knew they wouldn’t be hurting him. I knew my mother would never do that. We’re not cruel. ”
“Taking innocent kids isn’t cruel? They have Talon, Aria! And my brother. They don’t belong there. They’re not Moles. ”
Right away he knew it was a stupid thing to say. She’d been kicked out of her home. Cut off from everyone, even her mother. Where did she belong? A cold wave rolled through him. Perry winced, not sure if he’d inhaled her temper or if it was his own regret, his own sorrow. “Aria, I shouldn’t have said that. ”
She nodded, but didn’t say anything. Just stared at their joined hands. Perry drew in a breath. Her sweet violet scent was everywhere. His gaze drifted to the smooth skin along her neck. He wanted to breathe there, just below her ear.
“He’s a lot like you, Perry. The way he moves. The way he acts. He adores you. ”
“Thank you. ” His throat began to tighten as he thought of Talon. He let go of her hand and lay back on the bed. Dropped his arm across his face. He’d just been wrapped up with her in front of the wallscreen. The bandage on his hand was still damp with their tears. But it felt different now. He didn’t want her seeing him like this.
She surprised him by lying down next to him, resting her head on the same pillow. Perry’s heart started pounding. He peered over at her. “I haven’t even asked how you feel. ”
She smiled sadly. “That’s a funny question. ”
“I mean what you’re thinking. ”
Aria stared up at the ceiling, her eyes narrowing in thought. “A lot of things make sense now. I thought I was going to die when I was dropped out here. Everything felt wrong. Being in pain. Being lost and alone. ”
Perry shut his eyes, pulled into the feeling of what it must have been like. He’d been there. He’d scented her fear and grief. He’d known it then. He felt it now.
“Now what I feel most is this . . . this relief. I know why I’m alive. And why my body started changing. Now . . . it’s like I have the day ahead of me again. Like I can take a breath and know for sure it’s about living. But there’s so much more I need to work out. I never thought my mother would be capable of lying to me. I can’t figure out how she did it. ” She turned her head, looking at him. “How do you hurt someone you love like that?”
“People can be cruelest to those they love. ” He saw a flicker in her eyes. A question he didn’t want her to ask. Not now, when he was raw like this. Not ever. But then her curiosity faded and he let out his breath.
“You don’t hate it, then?” he asked after a while. “Knowing you’re half . . . Savage?”
“How could I hate what’s kept me alive?”
He had no doubt the words were meant for him. Without thinking, he reached for her hand. Tucked it against his chest, feeling that was where it should be. Her eyes went from their hands to his Markings. Perry’s heart slammed against his ribs. She had to feel it.
“Will you be the Tides’ Blood Lord?” she asked.
“I will. ” His own words amazed him. He’d wanted to be Blood Lord for so long. He’d never have imagined it happening this way. But he knew in every part of him that he needed to go home and win the right to lead the Tides. They couldn’t spend the winter hungry, with infighting and people vying for Blood Lord. They’d need him. Then he remembered the Croven, camped in the plateau. Waiting for him. How would he get out of Marron’s before winter came?
Perry looked down at the small hand pressed against his skin. He knew where he had to go, but what about her? “Aria, what are you going to do?” Somehow, in asking the question, he felt like he was failing her.
“I’m going to Bliss. I need to find out if my mother is alive. Marron and I talked last night. When the Croven leave, he’s going to let me take some of his men. I can’t just wait for news that might not ever come. ”
“Aria, I’ll take you. I have to go home. I can take you to Bliss first. ”