Oh, right. Historians still didn’t know whether or not Boudica had died of illness or killed herself.
“I did it. There wasn’t any other choice.”
“Yep,” she agreed, her brow wrinkled. “You’d have ended up like Vercingetorix, or worse.”
Diana winced at the fate of France’s greatest Celtic hero. He’d ended up on a pike in Rome, and that would have been the best she could have hoped for.
Esha paled, then set down her mug “Oh, Diana. What about your daughters?”
Diana’s stomach pitched. “I remember them. Not well, just vague snippets here and there. Their death is one of those. When I first remembered, it felt like being stabbed. It’s faded into memory now, and it’s my memory, but it’s not. I don’t know. I know that it hurts even though it never actually happened to me.” Her body ached, every part of her seeming to throb.
“Even if it didn’t happen to you in this life, I think that it’s something your soul would never forget.”
Diana nodded, lost for words.
Esha changed the subject.
“So you found your sword and that’s how you figured it out?”
“Basically. I’d been searching through books, but that’s something the old Diana would do. Apparently I just had to get ahold of my old sword.” And her new life. A crazy, violent one that she didn’t know how to reconcile with her idea of what her life was supposed to be. Her gaze sought out her sword, which lay on the floor near the couch. The sight of it gave her conflicting sensations of security and horror.
“Anyway,” Diana said. “I need to know more about the portal in the underground. I’ve got to save my friend.”
“I think you’ve got to do more than that.”
“Yeah,” Diana said, knowing that she was right but unable to focus on anything but saving Vi.
“I can take you to the portal in the underground. There are a couple of Mythean Guardians watching it to make sure nothing escapes, but I can hide us from their sight while we look through the portal. I’m able to see in, and with my help, you can too. From there, we can figure out what the hell is going on. No pun intended.”
Diana’s skin prickled at the idea of getting so close to the danger, but she had to do it. For Vi, for Boudica, whose pain and rage still seethed under the surface of her skin. For herself. To take back control of her life.
“Excellent. I say we go now.” Diana went to the couch to put her shoes on and grabbed her sword.
“Good thinking.” Esha nodded at the sword. “We aren’t actually going into the portal, but you never know what will jump out. We’ll aetherwalk straight there, that way you don’t have to walk down the street with it.”
Diana nodded and rose to join Esha. Just before she reached her, someone pounded on the door.
Esha looked at her quizzically, then called out, “Yeah?”
“Open up, Esha.”
“It’s Warren.” Esha smoothed her hair. “Let me get this real quick.”
When she opened the door, Diana stepped backward in surprise. Cadan and Warren strode through. Who had released him from his bonds?
“You.” Diana glared at Cadan.
“Aye, it’s me.”
Had anything she’d said last night made him see her perspective? His past actions angered her, but it was his unwillingness to agree that he’d done wrong that really got her. And the fact that he’d been trying to do the same thing all over again.
As herself, Diana, she didn’t want to do all of this alone and could appreciate his desire to protect her. She wanted his help, but not at the expense of her agency. Her ability to choose her own fate was vital to her. She hadn’t liked forfeiting it in her past life and she certainly didn’t like it now.
“Why’d you come?” Diana asked, her gaze glued to Cadan.
Use this second chance, Cadan.
His eyes met hers, fire in their depths. “To keep you from doing something stupid and getting yourself hurt.”