“By the time I left, it was starting to get a little crazy,” he admitted. “But I beat the rush, and we’ve got everything we need for the next two weeks. Plus, we have the pantry.”
“What are you saying?” She asked, looking at him. “Are you telling me that we’re going to be stuck together in the house?”
“Do you have somewhere important you’d rather be?” He asked, smiling at her. He looked at her gently even though he probably didn’t have the right to look at her that way. She wasn’t his, after all. She wasn’t his doll or his toy. She wasn’t his submissive.
He wanted her to be, though.
He’d wanted that for a very long time.
“No,” she said.
“Then what’s the problem?”
“It’s kind of scary, don’t you think?” She whispered.
“What? Being quarantined?”
“Yes.”
Only, she wasn’t looking at him like she was scared of being stuck at the house or on the ranch. They weren’t going to be locked up in the house, after all. They were safe on the ranch. They were around people. They were alone. Isolated.
So what was she scared of?
“Meredith, are you scared of me?” He asked gently, but he didn’t want to know. He didn’t want to know if she was afraid of him because that might completely break his heart.
“What? No!” She sounded shocked.
“Then what is it?”
“Well,” she whispered, swallowing hard. She looked at him and then she jumped up and started pacing back and forth. She wrung her hands and then finally, she stopped and looked at him.
“I let you spank me,” she said.
“Yes.”
“And I…I liked it, Daniel.”
Ah, there it was.
So she was scared of BDSM.
She was scared of domination.
She was scared of him.
Or maybe, she was scared of letting go. That was probably more like it. Maybe she’d never been in this type of relationship before. Perhaps she’d never interacted with a Dom on a serious level. Was that it? Was this her first time playing with another person?
Or was she just nervous around him?
“What’s wrong with enjoying a spanking?” He asked her softly. He sat perfectly still, not moving. He could tell she was wildly nervous and uncomfortable. He didn’t want to do anything that was going to cause her pain or anxiety. Nope. He didn’t want to make this wilting flower feel like she couldn’t get the help she needed.
And he didn’t want her to think he was going to hurt her against her will. That was the problem with playing in the world he liked to play in. From the outside, it was very easy to think that things looked like abuse. In some cases, they were. Not for him, though, and not with her. He would never hurt her beyond what she could handle, and he would never hurt her to be an asshole. He’d hurt her to give her orgasms, though.
He’d hurt her to make her come.
“There’s a lot wrong with it,” she finally spoke, but her voice was like a whisper, and he could barely hear her.
“Are you trying to convince me or yourself, sweetheart?” He asked gently.