Luis glanced at me sympathetically. “Or maybe we’re both just a couple of broken men trying to save ourselves more heartbreak somewhere down the line.”
I smiled. “That’s possible, too.”
“I’d like to meet her one day, Jake,” Luis said.
“I hope you will,” I said.
“Does that mean marriage is on the table?” he asked with one raised eyebrow.
“I don’t know,” I said, realizing that I might actually want to walk down that road again.
“You hope so, don’t you?”
I sighed. “I actually think I do. Can you believe that?”
“Of course, I believe that,” he said. “You never really got a chance at a real married life or at a real family. Why wouldn’t you want that now?”
“Because I could stand to lose it?”
“Then ask yourself: is it worth the risk?” Luis said. “And if it is, no matter how much heartbreak might come from it, do it anyway.”
Chapter Thirty-two
Kristen
“Can I try one?” Noah asked impatiently.
“They’re still hot, sweetheart,” I told him. “Just give them five minutes, and they’ll be ready for dunking.”
“They look so good.”
“They do, don’t they?” I nodded. “These were my favorite snack to make when I was ten.”
Noah’s mouth formed a little ‘o’ shape. “You knew how to make cookies when you were ten?”
“I sure did,” I nodded.
“Your mommy didn’t make them for you?”
I hesitated a moment, remembering my lonely childhood. Mom had mostly been working, and whatever free time she did have left over was spent on her friends. Of course, when Ted deigned to give her the time of day, nothing could keep her from his side. She would even miss work in order to stay at home and be with him.
Shortly after my tenth birthday, Ted decided to come and spend the weekend with us. He’d bought Mom flowers that looked like they’d been hacked from a neighbor’s backyard, and he had bought me a teddy bear with one eye. He’d claimed that the eye had popped out when he was removing it from the car, but I had never believed that story.
He and Mom spent the whole morning in her room, and I had to listen to a never-ending loop of moans and creaks. I took the radio into my room and listened to music until I had managed to drown them out. That afternoon when I emerged from my room, it was to find Mom and Ted in the hall pawing at one another.
“Kris,” Mom said. “How would you feel about spending the evening alone, all by yourself like a big girl?”
I had frowned at her in confusion. “Where are you going?”
“Daddy and I are going out for a while… We haven’t seen each other in so long,” she said. “You want Mom and Dad to have time alone together, right?”
“Yes,” I had replied because that was the only answer she wanted to hear.
Smacking her hands together, Mom had jumped up excitedly. Then she had disappeared into her room to change. Ted had sat on the sofa and tried to engage me in conversation.
“How old are you now?” he had asked me. “Seven?”
“Ten.”