“You have to find something else. I can’t keep doing this,” I said.
I pulled away from him and wiped my tears, trying not to smear my eye makeup too much.
He just stared at me with a blank look on his face. Just as he was about to say something, the door opened, and Artie poked his head in.
“Uh, sorry to interrupt, but I can’t keep them back,” Artie said. “Your fans would like to see you now, and they’re getting pretty rowdy out here.
“Let them in,” Justin said.
Then the crowd rushed into the room.
“Justin! Justin!” They were chanting as they formed a semi-circle around him.
I looked at him and then turned and ran out the door. I needed to get away from him. I needed to be alone and to think about things. I knew we had plans for the following day, but it was the last thing on my mind at that moment.
“Let’s go,” I said and grabbed Ally by the arm.
“What the hell?” she said as I dragged her out of the building and into the parking lot.
“We have to get going,” I said. I let go of her as we made our way to my car.
Ally asked me what was wrong several times on the way to my house.
“I can’t handle this,” I said. “It’s too much. Watching him get hurt. I just can’t handle the anxiety.” I was trying my best to hold back tears.
“That doesn’t seem fair,” she said.
I gave her a dirty look before I turned my focus back on the road. She was my sister. She was supposed to see things from my point of view. I couldn’t help but feel a little hurt by her.
“I’m just saying, don’t make any rash decisions,” she said as we pulled up to my house.
I ignored her and focused on cleaning my face. I didn’t want to face my parent
s or Margie after the fight I’d just had with Justin. I was hurt and scared. I hadn’t even been able to have a real conversation with him, and I now had no idea where we stood.
My phone buzzed just as I walked into the house. I opened the text message from Justin.
“I’m on my way to get Margie.”
“Ok,” I wrote back.
“How was the fight?” my mom asked.
“Good,” I said without looking at her. I didn’t want her to examine my face and start asking questions. “Justin’s on his way.”
“Did he win?” Margie asked.
I nodded my head and smiled. “Yes, he won.” I did my best to be okay and not let them know just how upset I really was.
“Well, I guess we’ll take off now,” my dad said.
My parents said goodbye to Margie and left with Ally, who had stayed outside. I figured she was pissed at me for ignoring her, but I had nothing to say.
Justin arrived a few minutes after they left. I’d been watching from my front window with Margie. She practically ran to the front door when he pulled up. I opened the door before he could knock.
He looked disheveled. “Hi,” he said.
“Hi,” I said. Things already felt awkward, and I knew it was my fault. I caused the argument after all, but I didn’t know what to say to him. I didn’t even know how to act around him.