Emerson
It was the first time I’d heard my name spill from his lips and something about it sent tingles through every nerve in my body. I laid out in the cool night for another hour trying to read, but honestly, I wasn't getting much accomplished. I was thinking about him.
After reading the same paragraph three times, I dropped my tablet to my chest and let my thoughts wander. I thought back over the list of men I had dated in the past. Most of them were what my granddad would call city boys—sophisticated, aware of their appearance, and didn't treat me like someone who needed a man to help her with everything. But my thoughts kept going back to one thing: in hindsight, they really weren’t all that considerate. Luke wasn’t like them at all. He always offered to help, never asking for anything in return, so why was I being so cold toward him? I kept telling myself he wasn’t concerned with the environment and that his profession was in direct opposition of mine, but deep down, I had known better since Ryan’s grandmother told me Luke uses the scraps from their lumber yard for his projects.
And if I was honest with myself, I liked that he was always trying to be helpful and kind. Granted, his schedule grated my last nerve a bit—the early morning workouts and the late-night shops noises were aggravating. Truth was, I could probably really like the guy if I wasn't mad at him all the time because I was grumpy as hell due to a screwed-up sleep schedule, but I was beginning to get used to it. I had even started running in the mornings while he was working out and chopping things in the backyard. I’m sure it didn’t help that I was frustrated my furniture had been delayed by weather and I was more than ready to sleep on my own mattress and be surrounded by my own things.
I shook my head at myself as I thought of the way I’ve acted toward the poor guy.
“He probably thinks you hate him,” I said aloud, talking to myself.
I decided to try to be a little nicer to him. After all, my grant had been approved, and that meant I was here for as long as Ryan was willing to rent to me... or until Luke bought him out. And if that happened, the decision to let me stay was his. And I wanted to stay. I liked it. It was surrounded by miles of forest, it was quiet—most of the time—and I had a neighbor who wasn’t a complete ass. Not to mention, every morning there was a pretty damned good view out my back window.
I smiled, thinking about the way Luke’s muscles bulged as he was swinging an ax. Then the night I stormed into his shop popped into my head. I had to catch my breath just thinking of the knot that formed in my stomach when his eyes locked on mine. I pushed the thoughts away and gathered my things to head inside. I needed a cold shower and long conversation with Rachel. She always helped me put things into perspective.
***
I came down the stairs the next morning dressed for a run. I walked out onto the porch, and to my surprise, I found Luke and Ryan stretching. I hadn’t expected to see Ryan since it wasn’t one of the mornings he was usually here.
“You gonna join us this morning?” Ryan asked as he hopped on his toes, warming up.
“I don't think so. You guys have fun.” I gave him a small smile then started walking toward the end of the driveway. When I hit the pavement, I started to jog. I had found a good trail by accident when I was driving around one day. I measured it when I left the driveway one afternoon, and it was just shy of four miles.
A couple of minutes into my run, I felt someone’s presence by me. I looked over my shoulder and jerked to a stop.
“What the hell, Ryan?” I said as I bent over, pulling the ear bud from my left ear. “You scared the hell out of me.”
“Well, you wouldn't join us, so we joined you,” he smiled. It was easy to see why he was so popular. Aside from being crazy attractive, he oozed charm, and his washboard abs didn't hurt either. I looked up and saw Luke still running, creating distance between us that grew with every step. I watched the muscles in his back ripple as he ran.
“He’s really a nice guy, ya know,” Ryan pulled my attention back to him.
“I know.” I nodded then started running again.
“Then why are you so standoffish toward him all the time?”
I didn't want to talk, I wanted to run... alone.
“I'm not.” I said trying to put my ear bud back in my ear. I wanted him to stop talking to me, and I didn't know any other way to make that happen other than to try to run ahead of him. He passed me with ease and then slowed so that we were in step again. He tapped me on the shoulder, and I finally just stopped, looking up at him.
“What?” I put my hands on my hips.
“Do you carry mace with you when you run or go out into the woods? Luke told me you venture out there alone all the time.”
“I do, now can I finish my run?”
“I would just hate to see you get hurt by something out there.”
“I can take care of myself, Ryan, I promise,” I snapped.
“Well, okay then. Sorry for trying to care about you. Jesus, can any of us get a break? You know... this is why Luke thinks you don’t like him. You have to understand something, Emmy,” he said with a kind tone. “We’re a small community that takes care of our own, and since you live here now, you have become a part of it. It isn't about you not being able to do things; it's about not having to do it alone. Think about that next time someone offers you help.”
He offered a smile that I didn’t deserve and then took off running, catching up to Luke who was pretty far ahead of me in no time. I felt small and a little ashamed of myself. I had been fighting something that I didn't need to fight. I understood what he was saying, but I had always just done things for myself.
I finished my run, thinking about what Ryan had said. When I made it back to the house, I walked the long driveway trying to figure out a way to apologize to Ryan and Luke, but they weren’t there. Luke’s truck was gone, so I knew they had to be driving down one of the roads on the property. They would have passed me on the road had they headed for town, and Ryan wouldn't take his truck into the woods.
I grabbed a shower, put on a pair of pajama shorts and a t-shirt, made myself a bite to eat, and plopped on the loveseat. The sound of chainsaws echoed in the distance, and I wondered if they were practicing for the competitions Ryan and his grandmother had talked about. I wasn't exactly sure what the competitions were, but I knew a little about it based on a few conversations I’d had with Ryan.
Since I didn’t have any actual work that had to be done, I got comfortable and began reading the book I had tried to read the night before. A couple of hours in, Ryan and Luke returned. It sounded like they’d both left again in Ryan’s truck this time. I thought about trying to catch Ryan and apologize, but I decided to give it a little time and apologize later.