I drank another sip and then responded.
“To be honest, Bryce, the answer to that is what scares me.”
***
I waited at the head of the boardroom table, tapping my fingers impatiently on the desk as I waited for people to file in. I'd been in an unexplainable mood since Saturday night, and no amount of work or exercise had been effective at shaking it. So, there I stood, knowing it had carried over into Monday.
Eventually, everyone was at their seats, so I looked out across the sea of faces and started to speak. “Good morning, everyone. Welcome to another busy and hopefully productive week. This morning, we're going to be discussing, among a few other things, a new French perfume campaign.
“But, before we do that, there's one last thing the executives at Harry Winston want us to wrap up for them. They want one of the ads reworked to incorporate some new information they have for us. Unfortunately, this means someone is going to have to schedule some evening hours to work on this with me, as we just don't have enough time to get it done with all the prep we have to put in for everything else on our plates.
“I guess what I’m asking is: who's willing to be here the next few nights after hours to help me wrap up this Harry Winston situation? I realize I'm asking a lot, but I did pick most of you because of your hunger for success, your perfectionism, and your dedication to work.”
I looked out over the table and was disappointed that I didn't immediately see a sea of hands. It was a Monday morning, and we were already loaded with work, so I understood.
“Look, guys, I can handle this on my own, yes, but it will take less time if I have someone to share the load. I would really appreciate an extra hand to assist in this.”
A hand went up to my left, and a strange thrill rushed through my body as I saw whose hand it was.
“Ah, it appears we have a volunteer. And, I can't say I'm too surprised.”
“I feel like the Harry Winston campaign is kind of my baby,” Lilah said with a smile. “And as such, I'm prepared to take care of it as best I can. I'll come in after hours and help you wrap it up.”
“Excell
ent,” I said. “I suspected you'd be the one to volunteer just for that reason. Thank you, Lilah. We'll talk about times and strategies after the meeting. So, now that we have that all cleared up, everyone please open your folders. Let’s talk about perfume.”
Chapter Fourteen
Lilah
I hadn't been able to stop thinking about Saturday night. In fact, it had been on my mind since Asher had left my place so abruptly. The concealed tragedy of his past, his immense strength and perseverance in getting through it, and becoming the man he is. More than all of that, his willingness to open up to me about it all.
We hadn't spoken since he’d left that night. In all honesty, I wouldn’t have known what to say if we had. I'd seen a side of him that I hadn't known existed. It was a side I was convinced he didn’t reveal to many people. I wondered what it meant in terms of how he saw me and the emotions that simmered just below the surface every time he and I were together.
My attraction for him was getting harder and harder to deny and even harder to resist. I'd had my guard up for so long, I'd almost forgotten what it was like to let someone in. Yet, here was this powerful man opening up to me. I wondered if perhaps he had done so hoping that I'd open up to him.
I'd wanted to. That night, after he had told me all those things about his past, about his family and those deep, painful secrets—of which I suspected there were more—I'd wanted to open up to him as well, to tell him more about my past, my own secrets. To feel vulnerable again, and totally open with another person. It had been so long since I’d last felt that.
In fact, I questioned if I had ever truly opened up to anyone. Even with Jacob, I knew I had always held something back. I had justified it to myself by thinking once we were married, I’d tear down what was left of the walls.
Maybe that’s what I was still doing. Because, on the other side of the coin were the feelings of harsh resolve, of defiance, of fierce independence. I'd been so strong on my own, why should I weaken myself and open myself up to another person? What would the point of that be? Especially this man, the embodiment of sheer power and might, who possessed an empire.
He was so used to getting exactly what he wanted, so used to not being defied or refused by anyone—did he think that by simply being vulnerable in front of me that I'd lay back and let him have his way? He was immensely intelligent, and I was fully aware of this. So, was this just a tactic, a page in his seduction playbook?
I shook my head and applied pressure to my temples. There were far too many conflicting thoughts whirling around inside my head at the moment. I was due at the office to help Asher wrap up the Harry Winston campaign at 7:00, which was only an hour away. It would do me no good to go in the state of mind I was in. I needed to be crisp, clear, and focused.
I stripped off my clothes and headed into the bathroom. A hot shower followed by a brief period of meditation would be exactly what I needed before the evening began.
It was going to be a long and busy week, and it was essential that I approached it in the right state of mind.
I stepped into the shower, turned on the water, and sighed as the hot jets pelted my skin. Not only was it going to be a busy week, but it was going to be interesting . . . very interesting.
***
“That's it. That's the last touch. We're done,” I announced
A look of relief crossed Asher's face as he stood from his desk after having sent the final file through. He stretched and then chuckled.