Kimber was pissed off. She was angry at Jarrod, at me, at God. I could see the hate spewing out through her eyes. There would be no talking any sense into her that day. It was the first time any of us had seen her get really emotional. Even though Kimber didn’t know the new girl at all, there was obviously a little of herself in Brianna and that scared her to death.
“I’m not trying to be an ass. We control our own actions. The night I got so drunk that I drowned myself in my swimming pool, I can’t blame that on God. He didn’t force feed me those drinks all night long.”
“Okay, let’s not get into the whole God thing,” Stan added. “The fact of the matter is that we all need to take responsibility for our actions. Not just what we do to ourselves, but what we do to the people around us.”
“Did you talk to your daughter?” Jarrod asked Stan.
“Yeah, we talked. She yelled, and I apologized. She yelled some more, and I told her I was sorry some more. When it was all said and done, she invited me to come visit her when I get out of here. She said she has a spare bedroom and that my grandkids are excited to see me.”
/> “That’s great, Stan,” Jarrod replied.
We were all just filling the time. Jarrod was a good therapist to try and get us to talk, but we really wanted to know how Brianna was doing. It was weird to me that I cared so much for someone who I didn’t even know. I really couldn’t remember a time when I had met someone and actually liked them at first, so feeling so bad for Brianna was a huge emotional step for me.
Group session dragged on for the whole hour as Jarrod tried to fill out time and take our minds off of what we had witnessed. As the hours of the day went by slower and slower, we still hadn’t heard an update about Brianna. My blood was boiling at the lack of information. Someone had to know what was going on with her. If she was alive, they just needed to tell us. If she was dead, they could do the common courtesy of telling us that, as well.
“Hey, guys, who wants to go swimming?” Melanie asked.
Everyone said yes. Not that we all actually wanted to go, but any sort of physical activity was likely to keep our minds occupied more than sitting in a group sharing our stories. I had waited for over a week to try out the hot tub; it was going to be fantastic.
I was nervous to go swimming. I couldn’t deny it, but I knew I had to just do it. If I started avoiding pools because of what happened to me, there would be no possibility that I would move on.
When we walked outside, Cassidy was sitting on the edge of the pool like she was about to get in. She had on a hideous, red, one-piece swimsuit that clashed with the red in her hair. I had to assume that the suit was standard issue at Paradise Peak because Melanie also wore the same one.
Although the style and color of the suit was clearly horrible, Cassidy wore it like a model. Her curves hugged the edges in all the right places. If I had to guess, I would say that the red suit was probably two sizes too small for her, but Cassidy had probably done that on purpose in an effort to try and look somewhat cute in the large piece of fabric.
“Everyone needs to read the rules and abide by them. If anyone is horsing around, they will not be allowed back in the pool area for a week,” Melanie called out.
We all diligently read the rules as we walked past and put our things on lounge chairs. I could tell a few of the other patients had been to the pool before as they walked straight over to a stack of towels and took one for when they got out. There were a few people who went right into the big pool without even touching the water to see how warm it was.
With the frigid air around us, I knew the pool had to be heated, but I still had a need to dip my toes in the water before I just jumped in. It reminded me so much of home and the new big mansion I had that looked over San Francisco. It had been a bit of a lavish purchase, but it was still my home and I couldn’t wait to get back to it. The only thing I really hated about my house was that it was empty. The entire place was extremely lonely when I was the only one there and there were no parties going on.
When I had purchased the home, it was for the sole purpose of throwing some kick ass parties. And boy oh boy, had there been some amazing parties. But now that I was getting clean and sober, I was making other plans for my future and I couldn’t help but think how impressed a potential girlfriend would be if I invited her over to my house. It made me smile at the thought of a nice, cute girl walking around and taking in all the views from my pool deck.
“You’re smiling,” I heard Cassidy say as she slid over next to me on the pool ledge. “I don’t think I’ve seen you smile much at all this last week.”
“I smile when you’re around.”
“I would call it more of a flirting smile, though. This smile seems to be more genuine.”
“Hey, my flirting smile is very genuine. I genuinely like to flirt.”
I chuckled at my own description of my flirting style. It was a bit awkward getting called out by Cassidy for flirting with her. But she wasn’t making me feel all that bad. It felt like we were having a normal conversation. Not a forced or awkward exchange, which was refreshingly nice to have.
Cassidy was a cool chick. That was what went through my head when I was near her. Of course, I also had much more indecent thoughts that ran through my head when she was near. Like I wondered how she would moan when I licked her delicious wetness. I wondered what her red hair would look like as she lay on my bed while I thrust inside of her. But most of all, I wondered what her pierced tongue would feel like when she licked up and down my erect shaft. The thoughts burst through my head before I had the chance to calm them, and before I knew it, my body was fully erect.
Quickly, I jumped into the pool to hide the evidence of my desire for Cassidy. I had started to feel a bit panicked as I thought about the pool and remembered the incident that had landed me in the hospital. I had to distract myself to keep from getting wrapped up in those memories. I reached up and gently pulled her into the water with me.
“Come in,” I said as I held onto her ankles.
“I was coming; you didn’t have to pull me,” she grumpily replied.
“You were coming?”
It was a childish play on words, but I couldn’t help myself. Cassidy laughed, but then turned away at the comment. She made her way toward the other end of the pool where there weren’t as many people.
I felt like a teenager who was at a resort with his friends. I could certainly see why the treatment facility had a heated swimming pool. Even though I had a pretty rough experience in my own pool, swimming generally brought about very good feelings for me.
“So, is this how you act with women outside of this place?” She turned to confront me when we were far enough away from everyone else.