I huff out a breath, not wanting to get turned on in the freaking bathroom. I blame Sebastian for this. When he got back here last night from his parents’, something was off. I get this strange vibe that his parents don’t much care for me. It would be horrible if my family didn’t like the person I was in love with… I pause mid-thought.
Yes, love. I not only love him, but I trust him too. How else would I let him come into my home and stay with me? Open my body up to him to have. We haven't gone all the way yet, but we’ve done almost everything else. I’m not sure why he is holding back. But I’m hoping this little getup will be the push he needs.
I read online that it’s around date three when people enter that phase. If you counted all the meals and him staying over, we are way past three dates. Once again, my shit got in the way of what Sebastian and I could have together. How much can he handle before enough is enough?
A few times last night I tried to lure him into us fooling around. I’m sure my subtle cues might be hard to read, but he hasn't had that problem before. I ended up passing out.
I grab my dress off the sink, searching in one of the pockets to find my phone. I pick it up, tap on the camera and take a few pictures in the mirror, hoping that he’ll finally get the hint that I want to take things further. Once I’m satisfied with the pics, I type in his name to send him a message. My finger hovers over the send button. Be bold and adventurous, I tell myself before I hit the button, texting him the pictures.
I put my phone down, getting my clothes back on before I head out of the bathroom. I wonder if there are a few more of these in different colors.
“I’m getting it.”
“Yes.” She does a happy dance. “So this means you’re giving Sebastian a chance?”
“I suppose. I know I put up some walls, but I think I’m the one trying to prove myself, hoping that I can be normal and he could truly want to be with me.”
“Violet. You did not just say that.” She rolls her eyes. “That man would sit in an empty room with you for the rest of your days if you asked him to. He is over the moon for you.”
“You think?” I shift on my feet. I think he is, but it’s nice to have reassurance from another woman.
“I don’t think. I know.” Eden helps push some of my insecurities away. I spend too much time by myself analyzing everything.
My phone starts to go off. An excited nervousness fills me to see Sebastian's response. I slide my finger over that phone, and my whole world tilts on its axis.
Adam is out. My heart starts to pound in my chest. He’s been out since last night. Sebastian had to know. Why didn’t he tell me? He thought I was going to fall apart and not be able to handle it. Anger fills me. It’s my life. I should know these things.
“Violet. Are you okay? You’re shaking.” My phone slips from my hand, hitting the floor. The panic rises in my throat. I can’t get the shaking to stop. I blink. I can see Eden’s lips moving, but the only sound I can hear is the thundering of my heartbeat.
Maybe Sebastian is right. I can’t handle this. That’s my last thought before everything goes dark.
“Where the hell are you?” thunders Miles.
I pull my earpiece out and let him shout into the air so my eardrum doesn’t get blown out.
“We got an ID on him. He’s at the convenience store on 4th and Forest,” murmurs Walsh in the seat next to me.
I make a hard right and head west, in the direction of Adam.
“You listening to me?” demands Miles.
I stick my earpiece back in. “Yeah. I heard you. I’ll be over later tonight. Got some cleaning to do.” I hang up before he can ask more questions.
“That Violet’s brother?”
“He sounds happy,” Walsh dryly observes.
“He’s thrilled about the news.” Sarcasm drips from my voice too. I guess I should’ve realized that Miles had someone on the inside feeding him news other than me. When it comes to his sister’s safety, he’s not putting all his trust into one person. Objectively, I know that’s smart, but facing the reality of it, that he doesn’t believe I can protect his sister, is a punch in the gut. I wonder if deep down Violet believes that, too, and that’s part of why she’s scared to allow me fully into her life. But what have I done to prove that I can keep her safe? I caught Adam and rescued her, but Adam’s out now.