“I’ve been trying to figure out what the hell to do here.”
His words sliced right through the beauty of the morning, killing any hope she’d built. His tone wasn’t promising. If anything, it was angry, confused.
“I watched you sleep,” he went on, still not looking at her. Damn it, why wouldn’t he turn around? “I even tried to rest, but there are so many thoughts going around in my mind that I don’t even know where to start or what’s real.”
“Everything that happened in this room last night was real.” If nothing else, she wanted, needed, him to realize that. “Did you only bring me here for sex, Luc?”
Speaking her fear aloud had her heart cracking. She wanted to be strong, she truly did, but there was only so much a woman could take.
“I wanted you.” Luc turned to face her, but made no move to cross the room. “I’ve fought this urge since you came to work for me. I got engaged to another woman knowing full well I wanted you physically. Even after that engagement ended, I still had this ache for you, even though I knew I couldn’t act on it.”
Kate clutched the sheet as he went on.
“I wasn’t in a good spot when we were at the beach house,” he continued. “I was an emotional wreck, and I never should’ve had you come with me, not when I knew just how much I wanted you.”
Her eyes darted back to his. “You were angry with me,” she reminded him. “Before the accident, you kissed me—”
“I kissed you because I couldn’t keep fight
ing the attraction. I kissed you out of anger toward myself, and then I was even angrier. I was rough with you, so I stomped off like a child.”
And then he’d been injured and forgotten everything.
Kate licked her dry lips. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Honestly, I don’t, either.” Luc slowly walked toward the bed, coming to stand at the end of it and holding her gaze. “There’s part of me that wants to be able to trust you again, but you hurt me, Kate. I never thought that was possible. And that’s what had me up all night.”
Kate cringed at his harsh words. What could she say? He was right.
“I thought we were going to move past that,” she stated, praying the possibility even existed. “You said we’d move on, that we’d have a professional relationship.”
Luc’s arms stretched wide as he eyed the bed. “Is this professional? I sure as hell don’t feel like your boss right now, Kate. You’re having my child, the next heir to the throne after me.”
“And is that all I am, then? The mother to the next heir?” She needed more. Even after her lies, she deserved to know. “Are you using my feelings against me? You know how I feel, and you got so jealous last night. Was that all to stroke your ego or to puff your chest out because you’re in control?”
Luc propped his hands on his narrow hips as he stared down at her. He’d put on his black tuxedo pants, but hadn’t buttoned them. It was hard to sit here and discuss all of this with him half-dressed and her wearing a sheet, but Kate had her pride, and she refused to give in to her body’s needs. She didn’t need Luc; she wanted him. Yes, it hurt to know he didn’t feel the same, but she wasn’t going to beg...ever.
His silence was deafening. Kate shook her hair away from her face. The nausea hadn’t lessened; if anything, she felt worse. She placed a hand beside her hip on the bed, closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
“Kate?”
The mattress dipped beside her. When Luc grabbed her hand, she pulled back. “No.” She met his worried gaze. “I’m not playing the pregnancy card for your sympathy and attention. You don’t get to pick and choose when it’s convenient to show affection.”
“You’re pale. Are you all right?”
If only he would have cared first thing this morning instead of starting this day with voicing his doubts and crushing her hopes.
“I’m dizzy. It’s to be expected.” She shifted, scooting a bit farther away from him. “I’m not going to be pulled in different directions depending on your moods, either. You either want me, on a personal level and not just for sex, or you don’t. If my dancing with some guy bothers you, then maybe you need to reevaluate your feelings. But don’t come to me again unless you’re sure I’m more than just a warm body to you.”
Slowly, Luc came to his feet and nodded. “I plan on having you, Kate. I plan on marrying you, actually. You’ll become my wife before my birthday. I’ll secure the title and you’ll get to live out whatever fantasy you had when you wanted to play the engaged couple.”
“What?” Shock replaced her nausea instantly. “I’m not marrying you just so you can get a title. I want to marry for love.”
Luc’s eyes narrowed. “You say you love me, so why not marry me?”
“Because you don’t love me. I won’t be used as a pawn in your royal quest.”
Air whooshed from her lungs. She’d never thought herself naive, but that’s exactly what she was. She should’ve gone into this with eyes wide-open and seen his motivations for what they were...lust and greed. Any love between them was absolutely one-sided, and she had no one to blame but herself...yet again.