We’d taken scuba diving lessons together, and my first proper dive had been with him as my partner.
Then there was my high school graduation when I’d walked across the stage to accept the damn stupid scroll from the actor who was handing them out like he was a big deal. I’d never heard of him, but Ryan was a huge fan and had run up to hug him and thank him. He’d pointed out I was his daughter and had spun me around, not giving a fuck who was watching and that he was making us both dizzy enough almost to fall down the three steps we had to go down.
Then there were recent ones, like his excited face when I’d seen my new Mini, or how relaxed he’d looked when he’d gotten out of Sam’s car only hours ago.
So many memories, but they weren’t enough at the same time.
I dimly registered movement beside me, but I didn’t look up to see who or what caused it. The only thing I wanted at that moment—no, that I needed—was for someone to tell me I’d get to make more memories with my dad.
Then a hand reached over, and fingers gently curled around my limp ones, lifting it until it was on the armrest. The owner of the hand didn’t let go of it, though. They kept it safe and secure, warming up my ice-cold one.
“A couple of years ago, I had a heart attack,” a deep voice said, breaking through the numbness. I didn’t recognize it immediately, but I didn’t care. It was soothing, and he spoke in an even cadence, and I appreciated that right now.
“All I can remember is lying on a gurney as they ran me to the operating room, staring up at the ceiling and bright lights. Know what I thought about first?”
I tried to shake my head no, but it was a twitch at best.
“How much blood and how many body parts could be on it, and what area there’d be most of them.”
That was morbid, but I guess it was common sense.
“Then I wondered how much their electricity bill was because those lights never seem to be turned off.”
None of this was making sense, but it had me thinking about it, too. How much would a hospital’s electricity bill be? Did they use energy saving lightbulbs?
“At the time, it felt like I’d been thinking about it for hours, but looking back on it, it was probably only about twenty seconds max. Then I focused on my family and all of the memories I’ve got of them, and I felt sad because I wouldn’t get to have any more with them.”
My eyes clenched shut, and I felt my hand jerk as the person hit on my thoughts.
“Hmm,” he hummed. “I figured. I had to have bypass surgery—triple bypass because I like to go all out and don’t do things in half measures—but it was a close call. My granddaughter’s husband, who wasn’t married to her at the time, told me that sometimes being close to death opens up the world for you. You smell things differently, you see colors more brightly, you appreciate a dandelion blowing on the wind more, and you see your family more clearly. All of the shit that doesn’t matter kind of falls to the side, and you focus on what does.”
The first tear since Ryan was taken away earlier trailed slowly down my cheek as the numbness started to fade. I didn’t want it to, though. Without it, I felt the pain of losing my dad.
“My grandson tells me your daddy was handed a gift when you were born, and a man doesn’t get a miracle only to disappear at the first hurdle. Hell, he doesn’t do it even after twenty hurdles. He comes back better, badder, and stronger, and he makes sure he lives each day like it’s his last. Know how I know that?”
From what he’d said only minutes ago, yeah, but I still shook my head no.
“Because from my wife, to my kids, to my grandkids, and now down to my great-grandkids, I’ve been handed more miracles and gifts than I know what to do with. Each time one of them comes into the world or gets married and brings someone new into the family, my heart grows so that I’ve got more space to love them. That’s likely why I needed a triple bypass to make it strong enough to give all of that love. I feel like the richest man alive, and so does your dad.”
That’s when I realized who it was. Hurst, Jackson’s grandad. We’d met when they’d come for New Year’s Eve, and he was one of the kindest men in the world.
Another person sat down on my other side, and I recognized him immediately from the news and news articles I’d seen. Ned Dahl, the governor of Texas.