Yeah, and look how well that had turned out.
But what the hell did all that matter now.
What she had to do was re-ice her dead brother. Because as gruesome as her nightly job was, it was a better option than being here with all her virgin status out in the open while a smoking-hot male took a lucky, lucky bar of soap for a test drive on his proverbial racetrack. And yeah, sure, she was supposed to be all self-actualized and stuff, all female-hear-her-roar, unapologetic of the choice she’d made about sex—which hadn’t felt like any choice at all, P.S.—but when you were attracted to a male and you were past the age when most females had had a couple of lovers? You felt like something was wrong with you.
And God, the way he’d covered himself? It was like he thought he was a dirty pervert or something. But come on, consenting adults and all that.
The bathroom door opened. And Sahvage came out, fully clothed.
Mae put her hand up. “Please. Don’t say it.”
“How do you know what I was going to say?”
“I can guess. You’re sorry, it won’t happen again, you didn’t know, couldn’t guess, didn’t mean to offend me.” She cursed under her breath. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”
He nodded at something in her hand. “Are you leaving now?”
Mae glanced down and discovered she’d gotten her jacket and her purse. Huh. Go figure. “Ah, yes. I am. But I’ll be right back.”
“Mae.”
She closed her eyes at his tone. There was so much compassion in it, pity, too. And if that didn’t just suck the sexy right out of the air between them. Not that there was anything left of that heat.
Mae shook her head. “I can’t talk about this now.” Try, ever. “Besides, there are more important things to worry about. See you in a little bit.”
As she rushed toward the front door—because she was going to have to way chill herself out before she could dematerialize—everything was a blur and she fumbled with the dead bolt, her hands sweaty, her fingers sloppy. When she finally got things open, she all but jumped out onto the front step—and it took some self-control not to slam the door, not because she was mad, but because she was totally uncoordinated.
The night air was cool against her hot face and she took some deep breaths. She had to in order to ghost out, but her lungs were also burning and she felt as though there was a hand around her throat. Walking forward, she was vaguely aware of the moon overhead. Just a sliver, though, so it didn’t cast much light—
A shaft of illumination blared out of the cottage from behind her, her shadow going long over the winter-dead grass, the shape of her body distorted.
As she turned around, Sahvage came at her, and when he stopped in front of her, she gasped as he took her hand and put it between his legs. The ridge that was contained by his fly was still very large and very hard—
“You didn’t turn me off,” he said in a guttural voice. “I just was surprised, and I wasn’t sure how to handle it.”
He rubbed her palm back and forth against his arousal, and as she felt him through his cargo pants, he hissed and shut his eyes.
“Nothing has changed for me.” His voice was so rough, she almost couldn’t understand him. “At all. I still want you all over me.”
Mae tilted her head up to look at him, and at that moment, he looked down at her. There was a white-hot moment of anticipation—and then the kiss was immediate and intense, her arms shooting around him and holding on to him hard. His arms did the same. He was so big, and that was what she wanted him to be. She wanted him massive and hungry and heavy on top of her, capable of canceling out everything.
Even Rhoger and the Book and that brunette.
When they finally paused to take a breath, she stared into his stark, starving face. It was impossible not to imagine them lying down and looking into each other’s eyes while they—
As a shadow passed through the shaft of light, she glanced back into the house. Tallah was emerging from the basement, the cellar door opening.
“I’ll be right back,” Mae vowed as she stepped away from his body.
“I’ll be waiting.”
It took a moment to calm herself enough to dematerialize, and as she disappeared from him, she caught a glimpse of him pivoting back to the little stone house—
When Mae re-formed behind the garage of her parents’ ranch, she was smiling. And it almost didn’t matter whether they actually hooked up again. Just the fact that he accepted her as she was? That was enough.
Getting out her car key, she thought about what that kiss had felt like.