If I let Shiloh leave right now, this will never happen again. The next time I see her, she’ll have her barriers firmly in place, will have edged us back into the safety of friends. If I were smart, I’d let her do it. I value her friendship above all else, and moving forward with this puts that friendship in danger.
Monroe stretches. “Go get a towel and clean up the mess you made.” She flicks her fingers at my come all over her ass and back.
As much as I want to argue, to stay and ensure Shiloh doesn’t leave, I do as Monroe asks. I owe her, after all. Maybe later, I’ll think about how seamlessly we worked as a unit when we had the same goal in mind. There was no jockeying for position, no undermining. Yeah, it was sex, but Monroe and I don’t stop the power plays for sex. If anything, we ramp them up. It’s part of the reason I’ve been avoiding her. I hardly know myself when I get my hands on her.
I didn’t expect that to bleed over to Shiloh in any way, shape, or form, but now that it has, I’m not willing to let it go without at least having a conversation.
Two minutes later, I have a warm damp cloth in my hands as I walk back into the room. The women are exactly where I left them, Monroe draped over Shiloh’s lower body; if I didn’t know better, I’d say Monroe was pinning her to the mattress.
Monroe jolts a little as I lean over the bed and clean up my mess. Did she think I’d just toss the cloth at her and make her do it herself?
You would have even a day ago.
The knowledge shames me. I really have been an unbelievable ass when it comes to both of these women. In different ways, yes, but the fact remains. I want to turn on the lights, to see their faces, but something tells me if I try, it will end this all the sooner. The shadows conceal all manner of things, and maybe each of us need to hide a little for this conversation to happen. “I’m sorry.”
Monroe lifts her head off Shiloh’s stomach. “Don’t you dare apologize for what we just did.” Her voice is so sharp, it sounds almost brittle. Almost vulnerable.
“No, not for that.” I shake my head. “I’m sorry for the past three weeks. I’ve mishandled things.”
Shiloh lets out a harsh laugh. “This is the third time you’ve apologized. You should know by now that quality matters more than quantity, Broderick.”
“Hush.” Monroe lets her head drop and gives Shiloh’s thigh a light smack. “Not everyone is as practical as we are. You have to learn to appreciate the moments when someone particularly stubborn comes around. This is two of those moments in one.”
“Who else—” Shiloh curses. “You’re talking about me, aren’t you?”
“Yes, love, I’m talking about you.” She plants a kiss on the center of Shiloh’s stomach and sits up.
The casual sexual intimacy sends a shard of jealousy through me, but it feels faint and unfocused. What if we got out of our own way and tried this? I’ve loved Shiloh for years, first as a friend, and then as something more, but she never showed the slightest indication that we were anything but friends. She matters too much to me for me to lose her completely because I want more, so I kept my feelings to myself.
But she didn’t come to this bed solely for Monroe.
I’d stake my life on it.
I’m about to stake so much more. Nerves make my voice harsh. “You said you only saw me as a friend.”
“I do.” Shiloh grabs Monroe’s wrist before she can smack her again. “Stop that.”
“Stop lying.” Monroe reverses their grip easily and brings Shiloh’s hand to her mouth to press a kiss to her wrist. “You didn’t lose control until he flipped me. Were you imaging it was you beneath Broderick?” She gives Shiloh’s hand a little shake. “Don’t lie.”
The silence stretches out long enough for it to become uncomfortable. My stomach drops, and my head goes light and fuzzy. We miscalculated. Holy fuck, we miscalculated, and now I’m going to lose everything. “Monroe—”
“Yes,” Shiloh says softly. She jerks her wrist out of Monroe’s grip. “Are you happy now? Yes, I was jealous that you got to experience that and I didn’t.”
Again, I start to shut this whole thing down, but Monroe laughs. “That’s not the only thing you were jealous of, was it?”
Shiloh looks away. “No.”
“Give us the rest, love.” When she still hesitates, Monroe lowers her voice to a sexy murmur. “Communication is hard and scary, but the rewards are more than worth the challenge. I would think your three orgasms prove that.”
“One of those was at my own hand.”