I raise a brow. “And here I thought he broke your heart.”
“That’s why I had to break up with him,” she whispers. Then her cheeks flush and she shakes her head. “I am officially the worst date. How many rules have I broken? The V-word—that was a bad call. Then talking about my boyfriend? Crying into my dinner?”
“I’m sorry I freaked about the virgin thing.” I clear my throat. This isn’t exactly a conversation I’ve had to have before. “Your first time is kind of a big deal. Add that to the fact that you just broke up with your boyfriend and I’d be a total asshole to sleep with you now.”
“I had to follow the sweet rocker back to his hotel room, huh?”
“I’M NOT sweet,” Nate says, but even as he says it, he offers me another bite from his fork.
I take it, watching his eyes flare hot as I chew. It’s almost like everything I do is sexual to him, and I love that feeling.
“I’m a fucking no-good bastard. That’s why we have to put on the brakes. Don’t let the dorky shit fool you. I’m that guy who isn’t going to call you tomorrow. I’m that guy who isn’t going to return your texts. I’m that guy who’s going to fuck you silly and then act like it never happened. That’s who I am. That’s how I live.”
“I have trouble believing that.”
“Believe it, sweetheart. Damn it.” He drops his fork, takes a handful of my hair, and twirls his fingers in it. “I knew you were too sweet for me.”
I run my fingertips over the stubble on his jaw. How would I feel if I slept with him tonight and he acted like it never happened? My body is so full of hormones and longing right now that it doesn’t seem like it matters.
“I didn’t come here looking for forever. I came here looking for tonight.”
“And tomorrow I’m just going to be this mistake you made once. Normally that wouldn’t bother me, but you’re special.”
“I’m not worried about tomorrow. Worrying about tomorrow never got me anywhere. The only thing that matters is here and now.”
I scoot forward on my chair and kiss him tentatively. I don’t know if he wants to touch me anymore. I don’t know if I should stay back, but I want to kiss him. I want him to kiss me, rub his scruffy cheeks against my neck before he bites it.
His hand loosens in my hair and he kisses me back gently, softer than he’s kissed me all night. I miss the frantic pace of our earlier kisses. I miss the rough way he tugged at my hair. But I’ll take this.
As if reading my mind, he pulls back and studies me. “I was too rough with you earlier. Jesus. I—”
I cut him off with a finger to his lips. “I liked it. Especially the part where you kind of pulled my hair while you were coming in my throat.”
He groans. “You’re killing me, Hanna. You’re this angel who could tempt a saint, and I’m no saint.”
“Maybe you’re right,” I say, tracing the blade tattoo on his side. “Maybe it’s not a good idea for us to have sex tonight.”
“I know I’m right. And I’m showing an uncharacteristic amount of restraint, so I should probably take you back to your room before that fades.”
His biceps flex under my fingers as I move to trace the Hulk tattoo on his left arm. God, he’s like this impossible combination of sexy-cool rocker and nerd.
“You weren’t lying about the tattoo.”
He raises a brow. “You won’t like me when I’m angry.”
I snort. “You’re a pussy cat.”
He stiffens. “Don’t try to pretend I’m something I’m not.”
With a deep breath, I remind myself of the look in his eyes after he surveyed my nude body. To this man, I’m as good as any of my gorgeous sisters. Better, maybe, though I’ll never understand why. It’s only with that in mind that I can muster the courage to slide off my chair and onto his lap. I straddle him. I’m so close that the stiff ridge of his dick presses between my thighs, only the soft cotton of his sleep shorts between us.
“So maybe we shouldn’t have sex, but I was having an awfully good time doing all the not-exactly-sex stuff, and I think you were too.”
“You think?”
“I know,” I whisper. “Because I can still taste the evidence.”
“Hanna.” There’s a warning in his voice that neither of us wants to listen to.