She did feel protective of him. Now more than ever.
“No locked doors,” he said quietly.
“No locked doors,” she promised. “Is this why you have problems with touching people?”
“I don’t have problems with touching people. Casual touch is fine. It’s the emotion behind the touch that’s the issue. I struggle with intimacy. Affection. Comfort. Caring. Trust is a big part of that. The more I trust someone, the easier touch becomes. But I find it very hard to trust.”
She got it.
“Once I found Aleki and Caleb, I made my own family. But those years,” he sighed, “they broke something inside me. Now, I find it hard to relate to other people. To express myself. To let myself feel.” He grimaced. “It’s easier with Caleb and Aleki. They don’t expect me to give them comfort or intimacy. I thought that sharing a woman with them would make it easier. They could give her what she needed emotionally and I would just be . . . a third dick.”
“Wolfe. You can’t settle for that. They’d never treat you like that. I don’t see you like that.”
He stared at her. “When I’m with you, I don’t want to be that. I want to be more. But I’m not sure I can or I know how.”
“But you’ll try,” she whispered, realizing this is why he’d wanted her in his bed tonight.
“Watching you with Caleb in the playroom, I realized that I wanted that feeling of closeness with you. But it’s difficult for me.”
It was a punch to the gut. She realized then just how badly she’d hurt him. She’d done the worst thing possible.
She’d left.
“I’m so sorry, Wolfe.” More tears dripped down her cheeks. “I should have stayed. I thought I was doing what was best. Instead, I messed everything up. I can’t be trusted with decisions. Will you ever be able to trust me again?”
“You left to protect us.”
“Yes. But I hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you.”
“Caleb always tells me it’s okay to make mistakes, it’s how we learn.”
“He told me that too.”
“Perhaps he’s on to something. Don’t tell him I said that, though. He can be insufferable when he believes he’s right.”
Pot meet kettle. She had to bite her lip to hold in the smile.
“That’s better.” He ran a thumb over her cheek. “I don’t like when you cry, it means I’m not doing my job properly.”
“Crying is sometimes a good thing. Helps me get rid of a lot of pent-up emotion.”
“Hmm, is that so?” A calculating look came over his face. “Would you say you need to cry regularly to help release your emotions?”
“Well, I wouldn’t say regularly. . .” Where was he going with this? Because she was starting to get worried.
“A spanking could help you cry and release all those emotions. I could put one into your schedule. Maybe a weekly one. Or a daily one.”
He wasn’t being serious. Was he? Oh God, with Wolfe it was so hard to tell.
“No, no, I don’t think we need to schedule that,” she said hastily.
“Hmm, you could be right. With how naughty you are, you’ll be getting them regularly anyway.”
Her mouth dropped open. “I am not naughty!”
“No? So you didn’t just disobey me by moving around when I told you not to?”
Her mouth slammed shut. Then opened again. “You’re not going to spank me, are you?”