This was her fourth session and while she knew she had a long way to go, she hadn’t pinched herself since that night Jed saw her thigh. She wasn’t sure she wouldn’t slip. And there had been a few times she’d really had to fight the urge. Those times, she’d used the techniques that Molly had given her.
No, it wasn’t easy, but she would get there.
“Daisy? You kind of have to talk to me for this to work.”
“He hasn’t spanked me.”
A moment of silence. She still didn’t look at Molly. “Shit. I didn’t mean to blurt that out. I mean. . .”
“You done anything to earn a spanking?” Molly asked.
Relief hit her. She knew Molly was in the lifestyle. That her husband was also her Dom. Still, they hadn’t really talked about any of this.
“Plenty.” She had too much nervous energy to sit. “I made myself my special ice cream, it’s full of sugary treats. Stuff I’m not supposed to eat unless I have permission. I ate two big bowls of it right in front of him. I nearly made myself ill.”
Her tummy had ached all night.
“I hid my binky. He doesn’t like me sucking my thumb and I’ve done it every night for the last week.” She took a deep breath, turned to Molly. “I hid the paddle.”
Molly’s eyes widened. “Jesus, girl.”
“He hasn’t said a word.”
“Daisy—”
“He hasn’t kissed me.”
“What?”
“I mean, he kisses me on the forehead or a light peck on the lips. But he hasn’t kissed me. He used to devour me with his eyes. Now I’m worried that all he sees when he looks at me is someone to pity. A victim.”
She clenched her hands into fists, waiting for Molly to reply. The other woman looked thoughtful. “You’ve had ten years with this. He’s had, what? A week?”
She nodded.
“And while you’ve got things to work through, so does he. Is he talking to anyone?”
“He said he would, but I don’t think he has.”
“From what you’ve told me, he’s a protective man. Looks after those around him.”
“Yes, he’s my dragon.”
Molly smiled at her. “Man like that, he’s not going to take it well that you were hurt and he wasn’t there to protect you. Even worse, it was done by someone he loved. Someone he trusted. Done to push the two of you apart.”
She nodded. She knew Molly would get it.
“Man like that, he’s protective and used to being in control. He’s also not going to like that he had no idea you were being stalked. That once more, someone got to you and he wasn’t there to protect you.”
“Neither of those were his fault.”
“No, but I bet he blames himself.”
She nodded miserably. “What do I do? Do I give him time? Do I just wait?”
“Man like that, patience doesn’t always work. I want to talk to him.”
That wasn’t what she’d expected.