“Damn it, Jacey. Don’t look at me like that. We don’t have time for a spanking or play. I don’t think you want to go the doctor with a red ass anyway. Tell me.”
Jacey drew in a deep breath. “Guess I was just thinking about everything I can’t give this baby.”
His gaze narrowed and she carried on quickly, before he thought she was being greedy.
“But I can give him or her a lot of love. And protection. I know that, it’s just…” she trailed off.
“I don’t want you worrying about what you can and can’t buy for this baby. You know this baby won’t want for anything, don’t you?”
“Derrick, you can’t just buy us whatever we need.”
“Why not?”
“Because…because I feel like I’m using you. You won’t even let me repay you by doing anything around here.”
“I pay people to do that,” he said arrogantly. “Would you do them out of a job?”
“Of course not!” she replied indignantly. “I just wish I felt like I was contributing.”
He watched her for a moment. “Did you know that I grew up poor?”
“What? No.” He’d shared very little of himself with her. Not that she could complain, there were still some big secrets she’d kept from him. For his own good, she justified, although she felt guiltier by the day for holding back.
He nodded. “Some days we barely had food on the table. My mother worked two jobs just to keep a roof over our heads. She worked herself into an early grave. I always vowed that my children wouldn’t grow up in poverty, that my wife wouldn’t work herself half to death.”
Her breath caught. “Derrick-”
“Then I let Cara do just that. She was so tired from working hard all day, that she fell asleep in the bus and missed our stop. She didn’t want to pay for another ride, so she walked back from the stop. Three men jumped her, pulled her into an alley. They raped and killed her.”
Jacey was speechless.
“I should have been there to meet her at the bus stop each night. I should have demanded that she not work so hard. But we had very little money and she insisted. Cara died because I couldn’t take care of her.”
“No, Derrick, that’s not true.”
He watched her with hard eyes. “But I can take care of you and this baby. If you’ll let me.”
“Oh, Derrick, you already take good care of us. We don’t need your money as well.”
“What good is my money, if it doesn’t protect and care for the people I love?”
“Y-you love me?”
Ignoring her question, he glanced at his watch. “We’d better go. We’ll be late.”
***
Holly glanced over at Derrick as she sat on the examination table. He sat in a chair across the room, the look on his face pensive. The car ride over had been silent.
He loved her? Did he mean it? Was he regretting saying it and that’s why he’d gone silent? Maybe he’d been remembering how much he loved Cara and his emotions had grown confused.
“Hello.” The doctor walked in, a friendly, older man. Derrick had arranged the appointment, so she knew he must be very good at his job.
“You must be Jacey.” He walked over and shook her hand. “And Derrick.” He moved to Derrick who stood and shook his hand.
“Thanks for fitting us in, doctor,” Jacey said. Derrick hadn’t been happy that they’d had to wait until now to see him, but Jacey knew he must have pulled a few strings just to get her in at this late stage.
“Not a problem. I’m only sorry I couldn’t fit you in earlier. After everything your fiancé has done for this hospital it was the least we could do.” He flipped open her file.