I didn't know how to respond, so I just lied.
Same.
I immediately felt like an idiot. She knew I didn't have a job so there was nothing I could really be cleaning up, except for my dorm room. Still, she probably wouldn't call me out on it. My phone chirped.
Oh, ok. Enjoying that New York City night life?
I laughed. This next text wouldn't be a lie.
Not tonight.
Her next text caught me by surprise.
Did you confess your love to James yet?
That was Tessa, always blunt and to the point. I didn't love him, I just wanted to fuck him. I knew that. I knew it. I didn't know how to answer her, though. Should I just lie to her? Should I tell her that it was none of her business. Should I tell her everything?
I fiddled with my phone while I decided, but apparently it was too long for Tessa to wait. Her face popped up and my ring tone went off. I sighed, thinking that the easiest thing for me to do would be to just hang up. That would be so rude, though, and it would just make things worse. She knew I was right here, we were just texting.
Eventually I hit the green “Answer” button. “Hey Tessa!” I answered, sounding cheerful.
“Dish,” she said in a deadpan voice.
“About James?” I asked.
“Who do you think I'm asking you about?” I paused as I thought about how to answer, but she spoke back up. “I thought you said you weren't going out tonight.”
I realized she could hear the chatter of the coffee shop in the background. “I just went out for some coffee, that's all.”
“Uh huh. What about James?”
There was no avoiding this. “We talked,” I said slowly.
I heard her do a squeeee sound. “And? Is he going to come to New York to see you?”
If you only knew that I went to him, I thought to myself. “I still don't know where we stand, to tell you the truth.”
“Well? Did he sound completely disgusted?”
I hesitated, and I knew that that told Tessa everything anyway. “No. But I'm still very confused about how he feels.” That, at least, was the truth.
“Well, you better make it clear before I call him up myself. I need a billionaire sugar daddy myself, and your brother might be able to get the job done. Might.”
“Stepbrother,” I quickly corrected.
“Stepbrother, right. I want you to let me know the minute he decides to come out to New York and sweep you off your feet,” Tessa said.
“I'll do that,” I lied. “I've got to get some studying done, but I'll chat you up later.”
“Sure thing, girl. And, if he does come out to New York, just make sure you're careful. He's got a reputation, and I'm not sure that you being his sister would stop James Coleman from being James Coleman.”
“Stepsister. And I will be careful.”
I thought that Tessa must have picked up the tone in my voice when I kept correcting her. “Is anything else wrong?”
I wanted to spill everything to her. I wanted to tell her about how James had fucked me, how I was so confused, how I wished we could just cuddle on the couch and have a slumber party, but I couldn't. I couldn't tell her about the mixed emotions surging through my stomach every time I thought of James. “No,” I said.
“Is it Dennis?” she asked,