Rauf sank down on the edge of the bed and spread two lean brown hands. ‘I was really surprised that you were a virgin. I know you said you were but I didn’t believe you.’
At that sudden confession, Lily blinked in slow motion. ‘You mean…you never believed me?’
‘I did when we first met…most of the time,’ he qualified, opting for total truth on that score. ‘But sometimes I did wonder if it was just a clever way of trying to wring a marriage proposal out of me.’
Lily lost colour and studied him in frank reproach even as resentment made her bridle. ‘You told me how you felt about marriage. I knew that what we had was going nowhere.’
Strangely enough, that concluding statement annoyed the hell out of Rauf.
‘There was nowhere for it to go,’ Lily continued helplessly, wondering why his stubborn jawline had clenched as if she had said something offensive. ‘I lived in England. You lived here. All that was on offer was a casual affair.’
‘I don’t do casual,’ Rauf drawled, brilliant golden eyes challenging.
Her lush mouth tightened and her lashes screened her gaze, her lovely face shadowing. ‘You just did…here, with me,’ she breathed unsteadily, her throat tightening because talking about anything so intimate did not come easily to her. ‘I don’t know what I expected, but it wasn’t the way you behaved afterwards—’
Rauf leant forward, closed one hand over hers. ‘I told you that I—’
‘That you were totally wrapped up in yourself as usual,’ Lily sliced in helplessly.
Hugely disconcerted by that condemnation, Rauf tightened his lean brown fingers over hers. ‘That’s not what I said—’
‘But what it comes down to. You didn’t care…’ Lily framed painfully. ‘About how I felt that you were disappointed.’
‘Disappointed? Is that what you think?’ Rauf demanded in disbelief, ‘totally wrapped up in yourself as usual’ still lingering with a sting he couldn’t believe and keen to shift the dialogue into safer channels. ‘How could you think I was disappointed with you?’
‘I don’t want to discuss that…’ Lily became very evasive when it came to the point of sharing how she had reached that conclusion.
Lacing his other hand into her hair, Rauf tugged her forward and devoured her mouth with a passionate hunger that had a megawatt effect on her startled system. Heart banging fit to burst, pulses racing, Lily looked up at Rauf with stunned eyes as he sprang upright, peeled off his tee shirt over his head and unzipped his jeans.
‘Rauf…?’ Lily whispered in a daze.
The boxer shorts landed in a heap beside the discarded jeans. Glorious as a Greek god, he had the additional appeal of being infinitely more hot-blooded for he sported a bold erection. Lily flushed to the roots of her hair but a wanton little throb thrummed deep down inside her in response.
‘Could I persuade you to disappoint me again?’ Rauf asked with sizzling effect.
Lily sort of slid down the bed into a more encouraging position without even thinking about it and ten seconds later Rauf was melded to her like a second skin. And if the first time had struck her as incredible, the second time qualified as wild. Afterwards, she fell asleep in his arms floating high above planet earth, got woken up to disappoint him again at some length. Then with a boundless energy that could only impress her when she honestly thought she would never move again, he answered a phone call, pulled on his clothes, said he’d order dinner for them and that he had to return that call. From the door, he gazed back at her, vibrant golden eyes centring on her again and he strode back, threw himself down on the bed to extract a last lingering kiss and groaned out loud at having to drag himself away.
‘Later…’ he promised huskily.
The sun was going down behind the shutters when Lily tottered out of bed to take advantage of his shower. She felt like a woman lost in an erotic dream. She felt sublime. He made her feel so loved. Wasn’t that strange? It was only sexual love. She knew that, of course she did. She tol
d herself that she was not naive enough to start thinking that Rauf’s incredible passion for her body meant anything more. But she was awash with images of having been held close and showered in endless compliments too.
‘You’re exquisite…’ he had said.
‘You’re perfect for me…’ he had sighed.
‘I find you irresistible…’
For the moment, Lily affixed, reflecting back to that last assurance. She was in love with a male who would never regard her as anything more than a small part of his life, who would never say the love word even under torture and who would always be very, very careful to promise nothing he could not deliver.
Rauf had once described the staunchly traditional Kasabian family to her and Lily sighed at the ironic damage that that trio of matriarchal figures—his great-grandmother, grandmother and mother—had done to their own fondest hopes of marrying him off. For a start, Rauf had been educated at an English public school and literally raised between two different cultures.
But when he was eighteen his family had begun inviting over the daughters of family friends and business acquaintances and telling him that he didn’t need to get married for a few years but that there was no harm in choosing early and settling on a long engagement. Over-protective of him, no doubt aware that with his looks and wealth he would be targeted by designing women in droves, his female relatives had been desperate to get him safely welded to some suitable girl even before he’d gone to university. Of course, given Rauf’s force of character and stubborn nature, all that pressure had had the exact opposite effect. Staying single had become a burning crusade.
When she returned to the bedroom, she discovered that her case had been brought up. Having dried her hair, she was in the act of clipping it back when she recalled Rauf’s preference and then, smiling, she left it loose. As she put on a pale green cotton skirt and a fitted, short-sleeved white shirt she thought about how much stronger she had grown since she was sixteen. At sixteen, naively believing that her long blonde hair was responsible for drawing Brett’s attention to her, she had gone out one Saturday and had it cut to within two inches of her skull. Hilary had been shocked but Brett had just laughed and had continued to target her. Apart from the occasional trim, Lily now wore her hair long in defiance of the timid teenager she had once been. But she would wear it loose only for Rauf’s pleasure.
Rauf was in the main room in the old part of the house still talking on the phone. His lean, strong face flashed into a brilliant smile of welcome that left her giddy. He closed an arm round her, finished his call and led her outside to a charming old stone-built arbour lit with lanterns that overlooked the lush gardens. Drinks and an astonishing variety of appetisers on tiny plates were brought by a manservant.