CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
ELLIE
It took everything out of me not to jump up and down when Gunner said he wanted to have kids right away. I felt the same way, but I didn’t know how to talk to him about it. I just thought he’d say we were too young, but I knew I wanted kids right away. I tried not to cry, but I was so happy I couldn’t help it.
Gunner sat up and pulled me onto his lap. I placed my head on his chest, and I just lost it. I wasn’t really sure why I was crying. Is it the idea of Gunner wanting to have kids right away? Or maybe it’s the fact that I’m was scared shitless because I’m worried that I’ll be a shitty mother?
Then, I thought about Ari. She had begged me not to tell Jeff about her being pregnant. I knew she thought that Jeff had a lot on his mind with Rebecca’s stupid stunt, but I also didn’t think she should hide it from him.
“Baby, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you, Ellie. We don’t have to start having kids right away if you’re not ready. I just thought. ”
I leaned up to kiss Gunner. He pulled away. He seemed so confused.
“Ellie, baby, please tell me why you’re crying,” Gunner said as he wiped away the tears from my face.
“I want nothing more than to start having kids with you, Gunner. I would like to start right away, too. I was so afraid to talk to you about it and kept putting it off. I was worried that you would think we were too young or maybe I wouldn’t be. ”
“Stop right there, Ellie. Don’t ever think that way again, baby, ever. You’re going to be an amazing mother. ” Gunner placed his hand on my stomach and smiled at me.
That damn crooked-ass smile of his gets me every time. I couldn’t help but smile back at him as I placed my hand on top of his.
“So, should we? Should I stop taking the pill? Can we do this, Gunner?”
The next thing I knew, I was lying back down as Gunner kissed me so passionately that I could hardly breathe. I could practically feel his love and happiness pouring into me with every kiss. Just his touch was enough to drive me crazy. I loved him more than life itself. The thought of us trying to start a family just about had me wanting to jump up and run around the room.
Then, I thought about Ari again and I tensed up.
Gunner pulled away from me and frowned. “Ellie…. what’s wrong?”
“Gunner, I have to tell you something, but you have to promise me that you won’t say anything to Jefferson. Will you promise me?”
Gunner rolled off of me, and we turned to face each other again. As he pushed a piece of my hair behind my ear, I had to smile.
“Of course, Ells. You know I would never betray your trust. Is everything okay?”
I shook my head. My heart started to ache as I thought back to Ari in the bathroom, throwing up as tears just poured down her face. I don’t know who was more shocked, Heather or me. I’d never seen Ari so broken. She should have been happy. She should have been excited to run back to tell Jeff. Instead, she’d sat on a cold bathroom floor, scared shitless as she cried her eyes out.
“No. Tonight, when we went into town to pick up mason jars for Emma well, that’s not why we went into town. ”
Gunner let out a laugh. “I knew that wasn’t the reason, Ells. ”
“You did? How? Why didn’t you say anything to me if you knew that wasn’t the reason we were going into town?”
“Well, I figured if Grams was backing y’all up, then it must have been something important between you girls. I wasn’t about to pry. I figured if you wanted me to know, you’d tell me. ”
Oh. My. God. I married a fucking saint. My heart was bursting with love for this man. Just when I thought he couldn’t get any better, he proved me wrong.
“Gunner, I just want you to know that I love you so much. Thank you so much for trusting me and knowing I would never hide anything from you. ”
“Ellie, I love you so much, baby,” Gunner said before he leaned in to give me a soft, sweet kiss.
“Plus, I know that Grams has like two hundred mason jars in the cellar. The second I heard her hush gramps after she gave that excuse, I knew y’all were up to something. ”
Laughing, I pushed Gunner’s shoulder back.
“Anywho…Gunner something happened tonight with Ari. It’s something big, and I’m not so sure that I can help her with it. ”
Gunner sat up with a sick look on his face.