I closed my eyes and took in a deep breath as I pictured her in the arms of another man.
Jessie…please come back to me, baby.
Trey and I had been dancing for the last five songs, and now, we were dancing to Britney Spears’s song, “3.” The more his hands moved across my body, the more I yearned for Scott. I knew Trey wanted to take our friendship to another level, and I was starting to wish I was going home tomorrow instead of on New Year’s Eve.
“Oh god, Jessie…your body drives me crazy,” Trey said as he pushed his erection into my stomach.
The twists and turns of emotions were driving me crazy. I enjoyed Trey’s friendship so much, and he’d helped me so much the last few weeks.
Do I want more than friendship with him? No…at least, not now anyway.
Everything was so raw, and the hurt in my heart was still so strong. The last thing I wanted or needed was to fall for someone else. Plus, I was still in love with Scott…even though I tried to fight that feeling with everything I had.
“Don’t Let Me Be Lonely” by The Band Perry began playing. Trey pulled me closer to him, and we began to slow dance. My head was spinning, and I felt so sick to my stomach.
“Trey, I think this is my last dance. I’m not feeling very well, and I just really need to rest.”
He reached his hand up and ran his knuckles down the side of my face. When he touched me, I couldn’t deny that I felt something. It was nothing though compared to when Scott had touched me…or smiled at me…or told me how much he loved me.
Scott…why did you have to hurt me again?
“Smile, my love. I hate it when you have such a sad look in your eyes,” Trey said with that sweet smile of his.
I looked into his green eyes, and I couldn’t believe his fiancée could ever walk away from such an amazing man. I returned a weak smile. “I’m just not feeling well.”
“Is it your stomach again? Maybe you’re eating something here that doesn’t agree with you.”
I shrugged my shoulders. I knew it was most likely just nerves. I had been such a nervous wreck and so stressed out that I hadn’t even had my period in two months.
Trey leaned down and lightly kissed my lips. I wanted so badly to open myself up to him more. I just wanted to be held in someone’s arms tonight. But what I wanted most was to be in Scott’s arms.
“Jessie, don’t spend Christmas Eve alone. Stay with me tonight. Please. I know you’re leaving in a few days to be home by the New Year, but please…let’s just spend this next week together.”
I let out a small laugh. “Trey, we’ve pretty much spent every waking moment together. I don’t think we could spend any more time together.”
He shook his head and kissed my lips again. This time, he gently bit down on my lower lip and pulled it with his teeth. I couldn’t control myself, and I let a small moan escape from my lips.
“Trey.”
“I don’t mean, hang out like friends, Jessie. I want to be with you. I want to know how you feel and what you taste like. I want to touch every inch of your body and cover you with kisses.”
Oh god…I want that, too.
But I want it from Scott. Only from Scott.
“Once we leave this island, if you tell me that this is it and there could never be anything else, I promise you that I will totally respect that. It’s just…I’ve never felt this way with anyone…not even with Renee. I was going to marry her, and I never wanted her like I want you right now.”
A part of me wanted to go back to his cabana. I could just close my eyes and dream I was with Scott, but I’d never hurt Trey that way.
I placed my hand on his chest and smiled at him. “Trey, I’m not going to lie and say that I don’t feel a connection to you because I do. I feel it when we touch and when we kiss, but—”
He started shaking his head. “No…don’t say but, Jessie.”
I took a deep breath in and quickly blew it out. “But it’s not fair to be with you when I’m still in love with Scott. I can’t change what my heart feels, and yes, I know, he hurt me. Please don’t keep reminding me.”
“I’m sorry, Jessie, but he did hurt you, and that bastard doesn’t deserve your love.”
“Trey, I keep having this dream. It’s about Scott and a little girl, and she keeps telling me that I didn’t even give him a chance to talk to me before I ran away. She told me I killed him.”