Gunner started laughing. “Don’t worry, Jessme. If shheee ever asks who I fucked and wost my virgin…virginity to behind the barn at sixteen, I’ll be sures to be honest and tell her it was yous. ”
I threw my hand up to my mouth. Oh. My. God. No!
“Nice, Gunner. Really nice, you asshole. You make a lousy drunk,” Scott said.
“Fuck off, Drew,” Jessie said.
I stepped back away from the door. My hands were shaking. He slept with Jessie? She was his first? That motherfucker!
I reached out, grabbed the door, and opened it as fast as I could. I stepped back when I saw Gunner come flying into the house. When he landed, he hit his head on the tile floor.
Oh shit!
“Motherfucker! What in the hell just happened?” Gunner sat up and grabbed his head.
When I looked over at Jessie, I saw she was looking at me. I noticed a tear rolling down her face as she held her hand up to her mouth.
She slowly pulled it away. “Oh god, Ellie…”
Scott helped Gunner stand up, and then he asked where our bedroom was. I told him and then turned back toward Jessie.
“Was he your first?” I asked.
She nodded, and I sucked in a breath of air. Fuck.
“Ellie, it wasn’t anything like that. I mean, we weren’t meant to be together. We were friends…almost like brothers and sisters even. ”
“Uh-huh…brothers and sisters who sleep together?”
“Drew and I started talking about it when we were behind the barn one day. He mentioned he’d never had sex, and I couldn’t believe it. I mean, all the girls around here loved it whenever he came to town, and they were always throwing themselves at him. I was only fifteen at the time, and well…one thing led to another, and we—”
I shook my head. “I really don’t want the details of the first time my husband ever had sex. ” I needed air, so I walked out onto the porch.
“Of course. I’m sorry. It’s just that…well, Ellie, it didn’t mean anything to either one of us. We were curious, that’s all. I’d heard my brothers go on and on about it, and well…I wanted to know. I begged Drew. I told him if my first time was going to be with anyone, I wanted it to be with one of my best friends. ”
I spun around and looked at her. “Funny because most girls want it to be with someone they love!” I shouted at her.
“I know, Ellie, I know. I wasn’t a normal girl. I was such a tomboy, and I didn’t want to be a virgin when I started school, so…I guess you could say we both used each other. ” She looked away. “Believe me, I think back to that afternoon, and I wish I could take it back. I wish I would have saved myself for when I met the man of my dreams. But I can’t take it back, and I’ll never experience that magical moment…ever. I cried afterward, and I told Drew how stupid I was for talking him into doing that with me. I felt so guilty, and I kept saying how I’d never get my special moment. He apologized to me for five years after that. Every time he saw me…he would say how sorry he was that I never got my special moment. ”
Oh my god. No wonder he wanted to make our first time together so special. “That must have hurt you for him to say he fucked you behind the barn. ” I walked closer to her and took her into my arms.
She started crying. “He didn’t mean that, Ellie. He doesn’t have a mean bone in his body. But you should know everything. ” She pulled back and looked at me as she took a deep breath. “When he came here the summer before he went to college, we started dating. It was for a very short amount of time, and I think he only did it out of guilt. I don’t think either one of us wanted to date each other. It was awkward. Maybe we were just trying to make each other feel better. I was actually totally in love with one of his friends,” she said with a laugh.
Do I really want to hear this?
“We only lasted for a month and a half. ”
“What happened?”
She looked away and then back at me with a weak smile. “Um…I called out someone else’s name while we were having…um…”
They dated…and slept together more than once. I think I’m gonna puke.
“He told me y’all were just friends,” I said, tears sliding down my face.
“Ellie, why would he tell you? Why would he want to hurt you or make you doubt him?”
I let out a gruff laugh. “Well, I can tell you I certainly doubt him now!” I turned away.