Once we stepped outside the fresh air felt amazing. I looked around and saw Amanda, Ari and Heather all dancing. They all looked happy and that made me smile. Jeff had walked out the back door and pointed at some chairs for Gunner and me to sit at. I still had yet to take a drink of the beer that was in my hand.
“Do you want to go dance with your friends Ellie?” Gunner asked.
“Nope, I just want to sit here with you. ” The next thing I did was probably the boldest thing I have ever done in my life. Especially since my brother was sitting right here. Gunner sat down and I sat down on his lap before I chickened out. I think Gunner was just as surprised as my brother. I went to take a swig of my beer and then felt something…. oh…. oh wow…was I making that happen? I stopped my beer right at my lips as I felt Gunner adjust me in his lap. Jefferson was busy looking at everyone dance so he didn’t notice Gunner lean in and whisper against my ear.
“I’m sorry sweetheart. I was not expecting you to do that and he kind of has a mind of his own. ”
I snapped my head and looked at Gunner. Did he just say that to me? He just told me I gave him a hard on? I started to laugh and leaned down and kissed him right on the lips. Jefferson or not…. I wanted Gunner to know how I felt about him every second of the day.
“Jesus Christ…can you stop Ellie…. I can take you sitting on his lap but not sucking his face at the same damn time!”
CHAPTER THIRTY
Jefferson…….
Holy mother fucking shit. I could not sit here and watch my baby sister suck face with my best friend while she sat on his goddamn lap. Christ a guy can only take so much. I looked back out to the dance floor and scanned for who I was looking for.
Ari…. .
She was dancing with Amanda and Heather to Usher’s “Yeah”. Fuck she could move. I wanted to know what she felt like in my arms dancing. They looked like they were heading over to get something to drink. I got up and walked over to Jack and asked him to play a certain song next. He nodded and I went and sat back down. Ari was drinking a beer and some of it ran down her lip onto her chin. Mother fucker……this girl has been getting my dick hard since I was 16 years old. She looked down at me as she wiped her chin.
“You been drinking long?” I asked as I smiled at her.
“Think you could teach me a better way to do it dickwad?” She said back to me with that damn sexy smile of hers. I didn’t care how many times she called me names…. as long as she was talking to me. I lucked out with douche bag Jason Reed out of town. Jack started up Rascal Flatts’ “What Hurts the Most” right then. I jumped up and took the beer out of her hand and handed it to Gunner.
“Dance with me…. . please. ”
She looked stunned but nodded her head yes. I took her hand and led her out to where a few other people were dancing. I pulled her into my arms and goddamn if she didn’t fit perfect up against my body. I had not held Ari this close to me since she was 11 year old and fell trying to roller blade.
I put my face into her hair and took a deep smell. I had to memorize every detail of how she felt, and how she smelled and looked right at this moment. I felt her relax more and more in my arms. I prayed that she was listening to the song…. she wouldn’t ever let me apologize for my behavior and this was the best I could think of last minute. I pulled her closer to me as the words to the song played that I wished so badly I could say to her.
I felt her grip harder onto me and all I wanted to do was kiss her. God I wanted to kiss her so fucking bad…. . she smelled like vanilla. Had she always smelled like that? I just held her tight against me while we danced.
The song was going to end soon so I leaned down and whispered in her ear.
“I’m so sorry I hurt you baby. If I could take it all back I would do it in a heartbeat. I never want to hurt you again Arianna…. . ever……. It kills me you didn’t get your special moment. I will never forget that I took that away from you. I’m sorry. ”
I pulled away and looked down into her face.
Fuck…she was crying…….
“Jefferson I need to tell you something and you are probably going to hate me after I tell you. ” She said in between sobs.
“Baby I could never hate you. ”
The song ended and we were just standing there. I reached up and tried to wipe away the tears that were falling down her face like rain.
“I…. I never slept with Jason. I just told you that because I wanted to hurt you as much as you hurt me. I’m…. I’m still a virgin Jeff. The moment I left that message I wanted to call you back but I was so angry still. I’m so sorry. I just wanted to hurt you as much as you hurt me. ” Ari spoke so fast I hardly was able to process what the hell she was saying.
Holy mother fucking shit…. . I spent almost a damn month punishing myself for something that never happened.
I closed my eyes silently thanking God she didn’t sleep with that asshole. Then I opened them and saw her staring up at me. I just smiled at her. If she had set out to hut me, she did a good job of it.
“Well squirt, it worked. I um, I need to go check on the food and everything. I’ll talk to you later okay. ”
I turned and walked away from the one person I would always love…. but never be able to have.
CHAPTER THIRTY ONE