Luke’s smile dropped as he looked out over the water. “Lib, I wanted to talk to you about something.”
My heart began beating faster. What if he regretted what happened? What if he wanted to take a step back?
“O—okay,” my voice sounded weak and that made me angry.
He glanced back at me and said, “I want to tell you what happened after I left to go to A&M.”
Oh shit.
I had laid in bed and thought about why Luke had brushed me off for hours those first few months. Now I was going to get the answers I had longed for. I wasn’t sure it really mattered anymore.
LIBBY BEGAN CHEWING on her index nail. Her eyes searched my face. It was as if she was debating whether she wanted to hear my reason for hurting her after that kiss. I cleared my throat and smiled weakly.
“Our friendship, Libby, has always meant so much to me. You were my best friend. You still are.”
Libby gave me the sweetest grin.
“Will had said something to me not long after we shared that kiss under the bleachers. I was so confused about my feelings. I knew for a while my feelings for you ran much deeper than our friendship. That kiss brought it all up to the surface.”
Nodding her head, Libby whispered, “Yes, it did.”
“My head started playing games. I started questioning if the kiss was a mistake. I wondered if you had thought the same thing. What if we started dating and it didn’t work—we would lose our friendship and that was the last thing I’d ever want.”
Libby took my hand in hers.
“Once I got to A&M, things were so different. Will’s words kept repeating in my mind. I couldn’t stop thinking of what an ass I was for kissing you and then leaving. That’s when I met Karen. It was only a few days after I got to school.”
Libby sucked in a small breath. I looked away. “I thought I could push the kiss from my heart—with Karen.”
“The girl from the Italian place?” Libby asked.
I nodded my head. “Yeah, but we were only together for a bit and then broke up.”
Libby’s eyes looked sad. “Was she—your first?”
Nodding my head I whispered, “Yeah. I went pretty far with Claire Montgomery once in high school, but not all the way. I kept thinking about—”
“Thinking about what?”
Looking into Libby’s eyes, I attempted a smile. “You. It’s always been about you, Lib. Even that night with Karen, you filled my mind and I tried so fucking hard not to think about you.”
Swallowing, Libby looked away. “Abigail?”
“My poor attempt to push you out of my heart. I swear to you I haven’t seen or talked to Abigail in I don’t know how long. She was lying to you when she said we were together again, Lib. I swear to God.”
Her eyes snapped back to mine as I searched them. I saw nothing but trust. Trust and love. “I believe you. I hate that she played a part in pushing me to Zach.” Shutting her eyes she shook her head. “Luke, we’ve both wasted so much time and have done such stupid things. I don’t want to waste any more time on the past. I want to focus on the future.”
Pulling my head back, I looked at Libby with a surprised expression on my face. “Lib, you don’t hate me? I mean I hurt you so many times.”
Libby frowned. “I want to be honest with you too, Luke. Two nights ago Zach sent me a text. I was confused and not sure where things were going with us, so I sent him a text back. I told him I’d call him yesterday, but I knew Zach wasn’t who I wanted. He was never who I wanted. It’s always been you.” She glanced down. “That day you showed up at my dorm.” Shaking her head, she wiped a tear away. She slowly looked back up and our eyes met. “I’d give anything to take that back, Luke. Anything.”
I lifted her hand to my lips. The sounds of the ocean rolling onto the shore made my heart take flight. Libby’s eyes danced with regret. I never wanted to see that in her eyes again. “I’m going to love you so much, Libby, that you will forget that day with Zach. I’m going to make your body feel so incredible that you’ll only know and remember my touch.”
Wiping a tear away, Libby smiled. “You already made me forget him the moment you told me you loved me.”
My heart dropped as I gazed into Libby’s eyes.
Grinning bigger, Libby said, “As much as I love your mom’s chicken salad, I’d much rather have you.”