Once I put the truck into Park, I turned off the engine and unbuckled my seat belt. I stared out at the river for a few minutes, trying to figure out exactly why I had asked Phil to look into Merit’s personal life. Or why I felt like I needed to put the money she had borrowed back into her account.
I looked over at the sleeping beauty, and a bolt of awareness hit me.
Merit wasn’t like any other woman I’d ever known. She was the only woman I’d ever felt a connection to. I hadn’t even felt it with Kaci, even though I swore up and down I was in love with her. My feelings for Merit had always been so…different.
She stirred and opened her eyes. When her gaze locked on mine, she smiled and sighed. And my cock instantly started to grow too big for my jeans.
“Hey,” I said softly as she lifted her head and looked around.
“Where are we?”
“That spot on Bitterroot River we used to always come to and drink at.”
Another smile moved over her face before it vanished.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“Why did you bring me here?”
I shrugged. “It was the only place I could think of since we’re both living with our folks.”
She nodded and looked back out over the dark water of the river.
“Are you okay?”
She shivered with her entire body.
“Bugs, are you cold?”
She turned to look at me once more. The moonlight filled the cab of my truck, and caused her violet eyes to somewhat sparkle.
“No, I’m not cold.”
I nodded. “Good. I, um, I guess I wanted to explain to you why I said her name that night, but I’ve been trying to come up with a good reason, and I can’t for the life of me think of one.” I looked directly at her and tried like hell to ignore the way my heart pounded in my chest.
With a hard swallow, I let out a breath and decided for once in my life to listen to what my damn heart was telling me to say.
“The night we were together was the best fucking night of my life, and I hate that my stupid ass slipped up and ruined our friendship, because you mean the world to me. You always have and you always will.”
She opened her mouth and then closed it at least two times before she finally pressed her lips together firmly. It was almost as if she was willing herself not to speak.
“Anyway, it felt like something was wrong on New Year’s Eve. You looked worried and stressed, and it bothered me for a few months. So, eventually, I called Phil and asked him to look into the reason why you left—and yes, I asked him to find out if you were dating anyone.”
“Why?” she asked, barely above a whisper.
I shrugged. “Curious, I guess.”
From the corner of my eye, I saw her unbuckle her seatbelt. I turned to look at her, and I felt the energy in the truck change. Merit’s gaze drifted down to my mouth and then back up to my eyes.
“I’m not drunk,” she stated.
I laughed. “Why did you say that?”
She shook her head and looked out the window, a slight frown between her brows. Then she turned her attention back on me. “I need you to know I’m not drunk, Dirk. I know exactly what I’m saying, what I’m doing, and what I want.”
“Okay,” I replied. “What do you want?”
When she dug her teeth into her lower lip, I had to fight the urge to moan. Holy hell, this woman was sexy as sin.
“You.”
It was almost a whisper, but in that moment it sounded like she’d shouted the one simple word at me.
I jerked my gaze up from her mouth to look her in the eyes. “What?”
She climbed onto my lap as I sat there, stunned. The moment I felt her sit on my cock— which was now well on his way to coming up—I forgot how to fucking talk.
“Is this okay?” she asked, her breaths coming so quick it sounded like she just ran a marathon.
“Merit, you’ve been drinking.”
She shook her head and let those beautiful eyes stare into mine. “I’m not drunk, Dirk. If you want me to move—”
I brought my hand to the back of her neck and pulled her mouth to mine, cutting off what she was about to say.
She opened to me right away, and I moaned when I felt her tongue start to move with mine. I cupped my other hand around her ass, and I lifted my hips as I pulled her closer to me.
“Oh God,” she gasped, dropping her head back. I kissed down her neck.
Everything in me screamed to stop. This wasn’t the solution to our problems, and I knew if we had sex, it would only add to them. But as much as my brain told me to stop, my body refused to listen.