Damn it.
I turn around and look up at him. “Thanks.”
His mouth is pressed into a firm line and there’s an unreadable expression on his face. I suspect it’s utterly deliberate, and it makes me want to kiss that hard look off his mouth. He’s so utterly controlled all the time that I just want to lick him all over and make him go wild. The thought sends another shiver through me.
Varrik’s frown increases. “You’re cold?”
“Just thinking about the garden party,” I lie. “They’re so much fun I can hardly stand it.”
His mouth twitches on one side. “They’re meant to be social events, for houses to intermingle and make alliances. I don’t know if fun is even on the agenda.”
I make a face.
Varrik just gives me that typical icy stare, but he’s making no move to put on his boots or brush his long hair back into its normal queue. Could it be that he doesn’t want to go either? I wonder if I can sweet talk him into staying up here. The thought of spending yet another beautiful day in the presence of all those snooty vultures makes me want to scream. Sure, it could be worse…but it could also be a hell of a lot better.
So I decide to try some persuasion. “Varrik, do we have to go?” I bat my eyelashes at him, trying to look innocent and sweet. “You know they all hate me.”
“They still have to tolerate you because you are with me.” His expression is cool. “Has anyone said something to you?”
“They don’t have to. I can see it on their faces. The way they treat me. They ignore me or look at me like I’m a piece of lint.” I shake my head and then impulsively reach for his hand. Part of me expects him to pull away and I’m absurdly pleased when he doesn’t. I squeeze his big hand in my smaller ones. “I know you like my company but…I think it’s not a good thing.”
He goes very still. “What do you mean?”
“You know what I mean,” I say. “Having me at your side is causing all kinds of problems.”
His eyes narrow. “Such as?”
I give him an exasperated look, throwing up my hands. “You know exactly what I mean! You’re here to hobnob and make all kinds of handshake deals with the other nobles, right? But since I’m with you, they’re treating you like a pariah. They go around you. They whisper about you. I see it happening. I’m embarrassing you.” I bite my lip. “You’re losing face having me at your side. I think I should stay in.”
“You are my companion—”
I exhale the breath I’ve been holding, because he’s still not listening. “You need to get rid of me, Varrik—”
“Never.”
The word is so vehement it startles me into silence. I stare at him in surprise and see that his tail is flicking under his robes and his hands are clenched at his sides.
“You’re not going to make a single alliance with me here, Varrik. They don’t like me—”
“I don’t give a kef what they like.”
And I blink again, because that’s the first time I’ve heard him cuss. He’s losing his cool, and underneath that solemn robe, he looks as if he’s practically bristling with anger. Not at me—at the others.
It’s so stinkin’ sweet that I can’t help but take a step closer, utterly drawn to him.
“If anyone tries to take you from me,” he begins, voice all growly with possessiveness, and it sends another shiver through me.
“No one’s taking me from you,” I say, and then because I can’t stand another moment of this sexual tension, I fling myself at him, launching myself into the air.
He catches me. Of course he does. He’s enormous and strong, and I’m a dainty flower next to him. It’s awesome, but that’s not why I have a crush on him. It’s because he needs me so badly. He needs joy in his life, and I plan on providing it.
Also? He needs to be kissed, bad.
So I fling my arms around his neck and press my mouth to his.
Varrik goes completely still against me. He doesn’t kiss me back, and when I lift my head, he makes an agonized groan I’ve never heard from him before. “You just broke several sanitary laws, Milly.”
“Sorry not sorry,” I say breathlessly. “I’ve been wanting to do that for forever. Human custom. Are you offended?”
“No.”
“Should I stop?”
“Kef no,” he breathes, and then his mouth is on mine again.
Just hearing him cuss makes me wet. I moan against his mouth, loving the hard sweep of his closed lips against mine. It’s oddly sexy because it’s so unskilled—he doesn’t know how to kiss but he just wants to touch me and it’s amazing.
“Lower us to the bed,” I whisper against his mouth, nipping at his lower lip.