Hennessy scooted off the bed, grabbing a pair of jeans.
“That doesn’t mean there isn’t room for you there. Ohio is a big state. I also have a house big enough for the both of us if you want to come. My door will always be open to you.”
Arin bit her lip when he dropped his jeans again.
“When I was three years old, I watched my uncle kill my mother and father. I’ve spent my life bouncing away from every home I’ve lived in, even now.”
Her face twisted in grief for him. For a little boy to see his parents murdered in front of him must have been traumatic. Not only that, but it being another relative would have shaken the stability of his world. Living his childhood in foster homes clearly hadn’t repaired the damage. They hadn’t given him the love and care he’d needed to cling to when he’d needed them most of all. He had never been able to find another place to give that same stability, and until he could, leaving was the safer and only option he could control. “You can stop or slow that roll anytime you want to, Hennessy.”
“I don’t know if I can.”
“The man I heard Moon describing is up for any challenge, even when he involves life and death. How about love, Hennessy? Are you up to that challenge? Because, as much I enjoy fucking you, after Christmas is over, that’s the only man I want in my bed.”
“I don’t know.”
Arin gave him a tender smile, placing the pizza plate on the nightstand to pat the bed. “It isn’t Christmas yet. Get that perfect ass of yours over here …”
Slipping out of bed in the dark, Arin quietly pulled on her housecoat to leave the room.
Walking downstairs, she stopped by the large Christmas tree. The club room was empty, as she had expected it to be so late at night. Lowering herself down onto the floor, she sat, enjoying the solitude and the beauty that everyone had contributed to decorating the tree.
“What are you doing?”
“Christmas Eve always makes me sad.”
Hennessy sat down, bracing his back against the wall. Then, pulling her to him, they both contemplated the tree, as if the twinkling lights could answer life’s most precious questions.
“Why does it make you sad?”
Relaxing back against him, she tried to explain what she had never been able to answer to herself. “Everything is so beautiful. Then, the next day, it’s gone. The presents are unwrapped, the gifts put away, and everyone leaves.”
“Christmas Eve was always my favorite part of the holiday until I realized Santa didn’t exist.”
“How old were you?”
“Three.”
The same age as when his parents died. If his foster parents didn’t share marshmallows, she was certain toys from Santa wasn’t high on their Christmas lists. Something as beautiful as Christmas meant so much joy for some, yet for others, it brought disillusionment. Not that there was a Santa but rather the magic of love that it represented. It broke her heart that so many missed out.
“Such a young age to find out he doesn’t.” Sadness tore at her heart that his parents weren’t there to protect him. Hennessy’s parents must have loved him deeply before their deaths. Only a deep love could have created the man she had fallen in love with.
“How old were you?”
Arin leaned her head back on his shoulder. “Ten. That’s when I finally had to admit it. I was getting too many weird looks. You don’t get as many presents when your parents know you don’t believe in Santa Claus. I loved playing the Santa card.”
“No one cared if I did or didn’t.”
Arin reached for a present under the tree. Turning sideways, she handed it to him. “Merry Christmas.”
“You want me to open it now?”
“Yes, please.”
Butterflies fluttered in her stomach as he opened the small box. When he didn’t move to take the necklace out, her nerves strung taunt. Arin lifted the long, silver chain, sliding it over his head, the key coming to a rest near his heart.
“The key is to my house. I had my address engraved into the metal on the top. No matter how many miles you ride, you can always come home to me. I’ll be waiting because … I love you.”
She saw him struggle with his emotions. Surprise, confusion, then awkwardness were easily read—as if he didn’t know how to react. “It’s okay. I don’t expect you to say anything. Just know it’s there when you need it, just like I will be. You don’t have to make your life a shadowbox. All you have to do is be strong enough to step out of the box and build new frames that lets the sun inside.”
He huskily cleared his throat. “You have to wait until Christmas morning for yours.”
“I can wait.” Arin wasn’t hurt that Hennessy didn’t respond to her gift or what she said. The protective barrier he kept between himself and the world wouldn’t be overcome in one Christmas. What he needed was lots and lots of mistletoe.