'His children do seem to be surprisingly close.' 'We have Alex to thank for that. He kept us all in contact with each other as we grew up… yet he had the toughest childhood. He had had three stepmothers by the time he was in his teens, none of them substitute mothers.' Donatella grimaced. 'Unfortunately for Alex, he was always very much Papa's favourite. Even my own mother resented Alex, which was sad. He was only a baby when his mother died. It was not his fault that each new wife felt insecure and then decided that her child was being passed over in his favour.'
'Maybe… maybe that's why he fell for an older woman,' Sara muttered abruptly, abstractedly. Understanding what drove Alex in all his complexity did not come easily to her. Yet she so badly wanted to know what made him the way he was: capable of such immense warmth and sensitivity and then such paradoxical and chilling coldness.
'As a mother figure?'Donatella uttered a reluctant laugh and shook her head. 'I don't think so, Sara. Elissa clung to Alex. She leant on him. He was by far the stronger personality.'
'What was she like?'
'As a family friend, we all liked her… That is, until she became involved with Alex.' His sister compressed her lips. 'Everyone knew she was in a lousy marriage. Her husband wasn't the faithful type and she couldn't have children. I suppose she must have been very unhappy but she never complained. She worked tirelessly for charity. She was very well-known for her good works.'
'You're describing a saint.'
'A lot of people saw her in that light, so you can imagine the shocking scandal it caused when she took off with Alex. Nobody could believe it at first but I had seen her with him…' Donatella's eyes were rueful. 'He was very mature for his age, and with Alex she was a different person. It shone out of her. She couldn't hide her love. We were all very surprised when she left Alex after her husband divorced her, but to be truthful… equally relieved.'
'Why? The age difference?'
Donatella hesitated and then sighed. 'Please don't take offence… but talking about Elissa makes me feel uncomfortable. In any case, I can only repeat gossip and my own impressions as a rather judgemental teenager. Alex has never discussed Elissa with any of us.'
Sara grimaced. Tm sorry…my curiosity was running away with me.'
'Why?' her companion asked bluntly. 'Why concern yourself? It was a long time ago, an episode we were all glad to forget.' '
Put like that, her own insecurities seemed neurotic. 'And you have been good for my brother, Sara. I saw a change in Alex today. He's more relaxed, less distant, not so driven as he used to be. You don't seem to be aware of the miracle you have worked. None of us ever really expected Alex to marry. When you grow up as we all did in divided households, it is very hard to have faith in marriage.'
But Alex didn't have faith in marriage. Oh, he had mustered impressive enthusiasm for the institution when he'd proposed but Sara reckoned that that had been for her benefit. No, for Alex this marriage was an experiment, with Ladymead the selected site for a home-making field test. But he would not be at all surprised if the experiment failed and he would probably be equally quick to cut his losses if their relationship hit one too many obstacles. The knowledge made Sara suppress a shiver.
Alex strolled into the drawing room of the town house shortly after midnight to find Sara curled up in the corner of a sofa, surrounded by a pile of magazines. '1 thought you would be in bed. You waited up for me…'
An irrepressible grin slanted her mouth. 'Alex, you suggested I rested this afternoon so that I wouldn't be too tired to wait up! Or did I misinterpret my instructions?'
The faintest colour highlighted the hard slant of his cheekbones and then he laughed. 'I didn't realise I was so transparent.'
'You aren't as a rule,' she said consolingly, her softened gaze roaming over his vibrantly handsome features. 'Would you like something to eat?'
'Nothing.' He surveyed her with an intensity that made her heartbeat quicken. 'So bring me up to date on the bricks and mortar rescue mission,' he invited. 'Everything's going like clockwork.' 'When do we move?'
"That depends on how quickly I can furnish and decorate.'
'I'm amazed that you're not putting us under canvas on that field that the agent had the gross pretension to call a lawn.'
'Somehow I can't see you under canvas.' She swallowed hard and held his gaze. 'And if you don't want to live there you can sell the house when the work's finished… no hard feelings,' she asserted.
An ebony brow was elevated. 'Why?'
'I didn't decide to marry you because you promised to buy it-'
'But it helped…' ' When I was walking round Ladymead that day, I had no idea that you were adout to ask me to marry you or that there was ever likely to be any possibility of it becoming my home.'
A slow smile curved his mobile mouth. 'But at least admit that you pictured some glossy magazine image of wholesome family domesticity: log fires, dogs and cats children…'
'It seems to me that you must have been tuned into pretty much the same wavelength,' Sara protested.
'Your wavelength. I see smoke billowing out from inefficient chimneys, cats that scratch and dogs that bark. But that's not important if you're content. Where I live isn't important to me,' Alex returned with wry emphasis. 'As a child I learnt not to put down roots because whenever I did Sandro and I were on the move gain. The abandoned wives and kids always got what was euphemistically termed the marital home. Becoming too comfortable or too attached to the roof over my head was never a good idea.'
The sheer physical upheaval of separation and divorce had not occurred to Sara before. Now she felt guilty. She should ha
ve appreciated that Alex had lived in many different houses throughout his childhood, never in one secure home. Had each new wife insisted on a new roof? And every time Sandro had opted for another divorce Alex's world would have been thrown into chaos again.
'While you, on the other hand…' Alex studied her with keen dark eyes. 'You grew up in a house where you were made to feel like an intruder, where nothing was ever really yours and where you felt you did not belong but where you tried very hard to fit. I can understand now why you dream of making a home that is entirely your own and why that need should be so important to you. But I have to confess that I didn't understand all that a month ago.'
And it's at times like this that / understand why I love you, Sara thought. Her throat had thickened. She slid upright and covered the distance between them in seconds. Alex's arms came round her and she breathed in deep. 'If the chimneys smoke, I'll get them fixed, and we'll start out with only one small pet-'
'That would be stretching self-denial too far, cam. The mice in that house require an army of cats.'
'Pest control, Alex…and they've already been…three times,' she admitted ruefully.
With a husky laugh, Alex pulled her close and looked down at her beautiful face. 'Only one warning, bellamia… if you ever bring a wallpaper book to bed-'
'You'll put the house on the market again?' she teased as he lifted her off her feet.
'I couldn't do that. Ladymead is yours.'
'Mine?' she said blankly. • 'It's in your name. Think of it as a wedding present.'
'Are you selling this place?' she mumbled in a daze. 'Why? It's useful when I want to entertain.' Abandoned wives always got the marital home… Was she getting hers in advance? And Alex was retaining the town house for his own use, ensuring that if they broke up he would suffer minimal inconvenience. Was it crazy of her to think like that? While she was wondering, Alex bent his dark head and exacted a long, lingering kiss that made her toes curl in wild anticipation.