“Kael! They saw you follow me out the door. If you tell them you’re leaving too …” I took a step back and offered a stiff smile as a couple passed us to enter the bar. “It will start rumors.”
“That’s what I love about small towns. All the rumors and gossip. It’s why everyone thinks I’m going to church Sunday and courting Tillie Cunningham.”
“Rumors are awful. And I don’t want to be the newest one floating around. I have a daughter still in school here. And Tillie was speaking from her firsthand experience with you. I heard her. It wasn’t a rumor.”
“Well, she read into the situation.”
“You were too nice to her!”
Kael’s eyebrows jumped up his forehead. “Is that a thing? Is that even possible?”
My mittened hands covered my face as I chuckled. “I don’t know. I … I just need to go home and get back into quilting instead of other stuff.”
“And I’m the other stuff?”
My hands slid from my face. “Yes. You’re other stuff for sure. Night.” I turned and wandered toward the parking lot down the street.
“Am I better than quilting?” he hollered.
I laughed and kept walking. There was no way I was answering him.Chapter ThirteenI married an old man, but he’s only thirty-seven. Why must he take such small, short steps? He’s average height. It’s just not normal or manly.* * *“I want to talk about your virginity.” The pot (me) sat across from the kettle (Bella) at the kitchen table.
“Why?” She smirked with her head angled toward her cereal bowl. “It’s gone and I can’t get it back.”
I picked at my bowl of fruit. “I thought we could be friends and discuss your first time. If you used protection. If it was or is serious.”
“Friends?” She raised her head. “Like how I’d talk to my friends from school?”
Tapping my fork on the side of the bowl, I nodded. “You’re an adult. I’m an adult. Let’s have an adult conversation about sex.”
“Fine.” Her lips pulled into pure evil, and I regretted starting the conversation before she had the chance to open her mouth again. “Did Dad go down on you often? Did you like it?”
My daughter made me blush. When did I lose my footing as the grownup in the house?
“See.” She scooted her chair away from the table. “You don’t want to talk about sex with me like we’re friends. And I honestly don’t want you to answer that question anyway.” Her nose wrinkled before she turned and shuffled her bare feet to the kitchen sink.
“So …” I cleared my throat. “You like oral sex?”
“Mom … please … just don’t.”
“Have you had more than one partner?”
“Right there.” She turned toward me, resting her hand behind her on the edge of the counter. “My friends wouldn’t ask that. At least, not in that way.”
“In what way?”
“Like a doctor. How many sexual ‘partners’ have you had? Seriously, Mom. Just … no.”
“Then how many guys have you slept with? Made love to? Screwed? Done it with?”
“Mom!” She closed her eyes and covered her face while laughing. “Stop.” She giggled.
I made a slow approach toward her and set my bowl on the counter before stealing a hug. “Fine. We don’t have to discuss it if you don’t want to. But I want you to know there is nothing you can’t talk to me about. I’m still your fiercest protector, but I want you to feel like we can discuss intimacy. My mom never discussed it with me, and it led to a lot of shame.” I pulled back, holding her at arm’s length as I grinned. “It led to your two oldest brothers.”
“They weren’t planned?” Her mouth hung open with surprise.
“No. They weren’t planned because your dad and I didn’t plan on having sex. We were raised to believe it was wrong to have sex before marriage. But we were young and in love. We were passionate and unprepared.”
“I haven’t had unprotected sex.”
“Good.”
She shifted her gaze to my hands holding her arms. “So … are we done?”
“Yep.” I released her and retreated two steps, maintaining my cheerful smile as if I didn’t just get shot down in my attempt at bonding with my only daughter.After slipping into my jogging pants and sweatshirt, Meadow and I waited outside for Amie. Ten minutes later, I pulled my phone out of my pocket to call her only to find a missed message from her.
Amie: Sorry, client emergency. Have to cancel this morning.Dropping my phone back into my hoodie pocket, I ventured down the driveway, turning north instead of my usual route going south. The air bathed my skin in its fall crispness, and snow still blanketed most of the ground, making my walk a little tricky in icy spots. Taking the first right, I trekked up the gradual hill toward the dead end where the Davidsons lived. Their daughter, Amber, was two years older than Bella, but they had become close friends through youth group at church.