After a few unreadable blinks, he smiled. “Joe Blow lives in Epperly? The famous Joe Blow?”
My scowl intensified.
“Do Jane and John Doe live here too? What about the Joneses? Mr. and Mrs. X? I bet Mr. and Mrs. Buttinski live here for sure or at least have a vacation home here.”
“I’m going to take you down.” Yeah, those words fell from my lips. When I heard them, I didn’t recognize my own voice. Who was that woman boiling over with anger?
“Take me down?” He laughed. “Okay. Just be careful. Women your age can easily break their hips.”
Women your age?!
“You are nothing but a wolf in sheep’s clothing, and I’m going to expose you to the whole town until they run you out!”
For real. Who was that woman saying such crazy things? Adrenaline hijacked my brain until the craziest nonsense shot from my mouth. But I couldn’t take it back. I had to own it.
His expression morphed from playful to the way one looked at a lunatic. “Um … okay.” He shrugged. “I mean … I do like a good wool sweater and warm socks.”
“Get out.” I tipped my chin up as my eyes narrowed into pinpoints.
His smirky lips rubbed together before he zipped up his coat, grabbed his bag, and sauntered out the door. The bell dinged and a gust of cool air swept through the store, diluting the potent cinnamon scent from the potpourri.
It didn’t help my insane case when he made a point to smile and greet every person he encountered in the square like he’d never met a stranger. They loved him, falling hard for his superhero charm. That was it. I needed to be more charming.
And I needed to bone up on my marketing skills to outsmart him. Sometimes products sold themselves, but more often, genius marketing was what made people open their wallets during the holidays.
And for the love of my future mental health, I needed to stop with the sex dreams.Chapter EightI married a slurper, and now I want to murder him every morning.* * *“It’s sexual tension.”
I rammed my elbow into Amie’s arm on our brisk walk at seven in the morning—coats, boots, yoga pants, warm headbands, and Meadow pulling the hell out of my non-ramming arm. “There is nothing sexual about us. I’m twelve years older than him. He’s trying to run me out of business. And …”
“And? That’s it? Age and free enterprise?”
“Free enterprise? Don’t say it like that. In a big city, it’s free enterprise. In Epperly, it’s ruthless thievery. He’s stealing my customers! There are not enough people in this town to keep both of us in business.”
“And that’s a bad thing?”
My head whipped to the side, and I pumped my arms harder as Meadow propelled forward. The smell of exhaust gagged me when a diesel truck barreled down the road past us, tires kicking up moisture and sand left from our first snow of the season. “Is what a bad thing? Going out of business?”
“You want out, and you know it. This could be your chance. No one would blame you. It’s life. Out with the old, in with the new. Established businesses go under all the time because someone with a better idea, a better product, comes along.”
“Craig kept it going. Maybe I need to offer free shipping on all orders—expand our delivery. Not that anyone is buying anything to be shipped or delivered. We’ve had less than ten monthly box subscriptions this whole year. The. Whole. Year!”
“That’s your ego, Elsie. The signs are everywhere. You’re not Craig. You don’t live and breathe that store, and people know that.”
“Craig’s parents don’t know that.”
“His mom has cholesterol off the charts, and his dad has lost most of his hearing and struggles with dementia. The truth? They need to be in assisted living. You think they’re sitting around all day thinking about the store they had years ago, but they’re not. They’re focused on taking their pills every day and remembering where they put the TV remote.”
“Now you sound like Craig.” I frowned.
“He wasn’t wrong. You have this innate need and capacity to take care of people and nurture them. But sometimes you forget to nurture yourself.”
“That’s what I was trying to do and look how that turned out.”
“So you stumbled. Get up and try again.”
I laughed. “Stumbled? I vented all my anger to my husband, he stormed out and died in a car accident, and you call that a stumble?”
Amie grabbed my arm and pulled me to a halt, facing her while Meadow tried to keep going by ripping off my other arm. “Everybody dies, Elsie. And few die at the perfect time … if there is such a thing. You want to talk about thievery? Let me introduce you to a little monster called regret. The last thing it wants is for you to be happy. If you let it, it will ravage your soul. There’s always more to be said, one last kiss, one last hug. Don’t go to bed angry. Don’t walk out the door with anything unsettled. Don’t fucking blink. Don’t be human. If you live your life in fear, it’s not a real life. Fear will rob your joy. Regret will cripple your happiness. Let. It. Go.”