Great Sass (Providence Family Ties 1) - Page 44

Looking from the gap between them and back up at me, Lily’s mouth opened and closed. “You’ve got to be shitting me?”

“No, I’m fairly certain that’s about accurate.”

“But— That’s—” she spluttered. “Girl, you were practically a virgin!”

“I guess,” I shrugged. “But Elijah was bigger.”

Again, we went through the finger measurements in the air, finally stopping on one that was accurate for Elijah.

“Lord have mercy,” she whispered, looking at her fingers with appreciation this time. “I love my husband fiercely, but just to say, I’m damn glad he’s in proportion.”

Yeah, that would be a crying shame. At six foot six inches tall, if Elijah’s penis had been tiny, that would have been an injustice to humanity.

Which led me to a depressing thought that I’d been trying to smother. “Do you think some other lucky bitch is experiencing his perfect, pierced pecker? No, wait,” I cried, holding my hand up. “Don’t answer that. I don’t want to know.”

I was in the process of jumping onto the ground, not caring about the pain when she grabbed my hand and stopped me. “No way in hell. I heard what he was like when Shonelle—” she stopped when she saw my expression. “What he looked like that night, and my husband said he looked like he betrayed you just by having a past. A man who feels like that about a woman doesn’t hop from her bed to the next. At least, not if he’s a real man, and Elijah strikes me as one of those.”

Her words gave me hope, even though I was still hurt over how he’d handled it, so when we went back out to the bar and Jackson informed me that he was going to be looking after me and not to give him any lip about it, I didn’t argue. And then he told me that Elijah had texted him before he left to ask him to look in on me, and I almost melted like the lava wax from last night.

If his brother was going to do that, then I had to mean something to Elijah, right? Yeah, he could be doing it for the rest of his family or just because he was a great guy, but I preferred my first answer.

Plus, after hearing about the postcards from Orson, I knew I wouldn’t sleep well if it was just me, so I went with it.

Something I regretted later on.

Five hours later…

The room outside the hole was freaking massive, and this time there was a turkey on the table making my mouth water.

Poking my head out, I looked around for the bloody blue cat, knowing he was going to skate in on ice or torment me somehow. But then my stomach rumbled, and wafts of the scent of the cooked turkey hit me full-on, and I knew I was going to make a run to get some.

A glance behind me at my little matchbox bed showed my table was set up for my feast, and the thimble I’d painted black to look like one of the table decorations was under my arm to act as both a costume and a way to carry the food back. Nothing was holding me back.

Running as fast as I could, I got to the couch and crawled under it until I reached the other side. Then it was a short sprint toward the table, where the decorative Thanksgiving cloth touched the ground for me to pull myself up.

Just as I got to the top, something clattered to the ground behind me, and I had to dive into the flower and gourd centerpiece to stick my hat on. Scanning the room as discreetly as I could, I almost fell over when Betty White walked past me with a plate, followed by the other Golden Girls.

Loading up their plates, they carried them over to a door that led to the lanai—something I didn’t even realize we had, and I’d been living here for eighty years.

As soon as the room was clear, I was on the food, loading my hat up with a pea, some potato, and a ton of turkey. I’d have to come back later for pumpkin pie and dessert.

Turning around to scale my way back down the tablecloth, I came face to face with Tom, but this time his face looked like Orson Riley’s. Suddenly he was straightening up to his full height, and the fact I was a tiny, vulnerable mouse became very, very clear.

“Welcome back, Sadie, love. This time you’re not getting away…”

Sitting up straight in bed, I screamed my arse off. It was like all of the pressure inside of me just burst and came out in an ear-piercing shriek.

The door to the bathroom burst open, and a naked man came running out of it, looking furious and ready to kill someone.

Tags: Mary B. Moore Providence Family Ties Romance
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