“Well, yeah, I read that online, but I’m wearing a swimsuit.”
“Okay,” I answered slowly.
“What, is that weird or something?” Court pursed her lips, looking uncomfortable.
“No, I just don’t think anyone wears them. If you insist, I’d go with the two piece. Stop hiding your curves.”
“Definitely the two piece,” Callie chimed in. “You’re in the best shape of your life.”
“Okay, I’ll just change then. Carry on,” she said, waving her hands toward our wine glasses and slipping in the bathroom.
A little while later Courtney left, and Callie began cleaning the kitchen. Sleepiness crept up on me fast, and I stifled a yawn.
“Do you mind if I take a bath?” Callie asked.
“No,” I said with my eyes half-closed.
“Get in bed, sleepy head,” she told me. “And thanks.”
“For what?”
“For being a friend, even when I make that hard.”
“Anytime, Mom.”
“Don’t say that,” she said, grabbing her toiletries bag. “I want to loosen up. I just don’t know how.”
“Do you ever watch porn? That loosens me up plenty,” I said, jokingly. I’d never had a real interest in watching videos. I wanted the real thing. Something visceral. Something alive, or nothing at all.
“Oh, shut up,” she yelled playfully as she shut the bathroom door.
“You know I love you,” I shouted, before crashing into bed.I woke up in a pitch-dark cabin to the sound of my two friends snoring away. Looking at my phone, I saw it was two in the morning. Sitting up, I scrolled through my phone quickly before setting it back down. It was worthless here without Wi-Fi or 4G.
Knowing I wouldn’t fall back asleep, I quietly slipped on my booties and wrapped a chunky orange scarf around my neck. I pulled on an oversized, loose-knit cardigan that hit my knees.
Going into the kitchen, I poured a few inches of whiskey in a ceramic mug and headed outside, knowing the amber liquid would keep me warm.
The night air was cool, and as I walked toward the water’s edge my breath caught at the swollen moon hanging above me. It reflected over the still, dark water and lit the shore with its magic.
I had always been wooed by the moon, by the constant changing she underwent each month. Yet she always came back to where she started. She was grounded in her cycle, yet fluid in her daily transformation.
I wanted to be more like her.
I wanted to be a consistent chaos, a steadily shifting enigma. I wanted to be something I couldn’t quite figure out.
Walking to the edge of the water, I sipped my smooth beverage, inhaling the smell of the salty sea.
“Hey,” a voice called out.
I jumped, startled for the second time today when I thought I was alone.
Turning, I saw the bright-faced guy from the lobby sitting on a log. He had a welcoming smile, and my eyes lifted, taking in the coincidence.
Maybe I’d woken up for a reason, after all.
“Wanna sit?” he asked, patting the spot next to him.
“Yeah,” I said, sitting down. “I’m Willow.”
“I’m Ashton,” he said, offering me his hand to shake. “What are you doing out so late?”
“I couldn’t sleep.” I sighed, touching my hair, wishing I’d tucked the tangled mess of black locks under the safety of a beanie.
“Yeah, me either.”
His hand rested next to mine on the log, and I instinctively wanted to reach for it. I wanted to hold him close. He was a stranger, but the night felt special.
“You’re so beautiful,” he said.
I laughed, caught off guard by his direct approach. “Thanks?”
“You really are. Sorry if saying that is weird, but I saw you in the lobby earlier, and couldn’t stop talking to my friends about how gorgeous you were.”
“Well, thank you. I actually thought the same thing about you,” I admitted. I didn’t tell him I had also thought a few more things about him. Namely where he could put his hands.
“Oh, you told your friends I was beautiful?”
“Oh, no. I didn’t tell my friends anything.” I blushed under his stare. His eyes were intoxicating.
“So you want to keep this a secret?”
“What a secret?” I whispered.
“This.” His hands held my cheeks, his fingers brushed against my ears, and then he kissed my lips.
It was so unexpected, such a lovely surprise, that I exhaled, knowing it sounded more like a moan. But I didn’t care. His mouth was soft and firm, his hands wrapped around the back of my head as he steadied me. I sank into the moment.
His tongue found mine and we gently explored the sensation of the collision. It was earnest and intoxicating. Warmth spread through me as we pulled away to catch our breath. He leaned in again, for a small kiss. Then again, and again, as if he couldn’t help himself.
He was confident in a humble way, not desperate and grabby like other guys.
Leaning into him, I let him know that I wanted this to happen. There was a playful quality to our kisses and when his hands found their way under my sweater, and then inched up the hem of my cami, I let his fingers tickle my skin.