Barely given any time to recoup from my orgasm, Harrison stands up and removes the rest of his clothes. He never takes his eyes off me as I lie boneless and panting from my first release. Anticipation slides through me because if there’s one thing I know for certain, it’s that more will follow. Harrison never gives them out in anything less than multiples. He’s crazy talented in the orgasm-giving department.
The moment he’s completely naked, he slides back in bed, climbing on top of me. His touch is gentle as he caresses my jaw, running his hand down my neck. When he gets to my heart, he pauses. I know what he’s looking at. Pain ricochets through my body as the memories come flooding back. The simple H tattoo that I had inked over my heart on our honeymoon. It matches the one he had put on his hand. While I wanted to keep mine private, something just for him or me to see, he chose to put his right in the soft skin between his thumb and first finger. Somewhere he could always see it.
His eyes flash to mine, a mixture of angst and fury. Not at me, I know. He has never directed any of his anger my way. At the situation. Our situation. I open my mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. Those dark eyes soften and hold mine as he slowly bends down and places his lips on my chest. Right over my heart. Right over the letter that stands for him. I have to fight the tears that burn my eyes. I will not cry. Not anymore.
It’s over.
As if to gently remind me that it’s anything but, his chiseled features take on a determination I haven’t seen in a while. His hands move to my thighs as he repositions himself between them. Something’s different, but I don’t know what. I can’t figure it out. My mind won’t even begin to wrap around this weird sense of purpose that settles in. It’s as if this isn’t just sex, as if something greater is about to happen.
I should stop this. I should. But I don’t.
I can’t.
I need him too much.
Want him more than I ever have.
We’re about to do something we can never go back from, but I can’t seem to find an ounce of care. I’ll deal with the consequences later, and something tells me there’ll be plenty of those. Right now, I just need him. I need the old Harrison. I need to forget the hurt and the nights alone. I just want to… remember.
“Please,” I beg, my voice husky and needy.
Harrison reaches down and positions himself between my legs. I can feel the tip of his cock slide against my clit, jolts of pleasure rippling through my body. “You’re sure?” he asks, his eyes burning with intensity and desire.
“Yes.”
When that one word falls from my lips, he thrusts, filling me so completely that it steals the very air I breathe. I gasp his name, my body tight with the need to come once more. He’s so big, bigger than I remember, but it feels like something else, something more. Home. I fight the tears, willing them away. I refuse to be the weak woman, the one who caves and takes him back. We didn’t work. We proved that. But this? Sex, intimacy, it always worked.
“Fuck,” he mumbles, holding completely still and letting me adjust to his size. “I gotta move, baby.” It comes out a pant, a plea.
“Yes, move. Move, Harrison.”
And he does. He pulls almost completely out and pivots his hips once more. From the beginning, he sets a hard pace. The bed slams into the wall, the painting above our heads shakes, but I don’t care. This. This is all I care about, at least for now. The feel of his body pressing me into the mattress, the feel of his skin sliding against mine.
His hand goes to my jaw, cradling me as he so often would. His eyes burn into me with an honesty I don’t want to see, don’t want to feel. But I do. I feel everything. His hips slam into my inner thighs and my muscles start to burn, a subtle reminder that I haven’t used them in quite a while. Harrison pounds into me with force, a man already past the point of losing control. I’ve always loved the way he lets go, orchestrating my body perfectly and taking me places no one before him ever could. He knows me, knows my needs, my desires.
And he never disappoints.
At least when it comes to sex.
The flex of his hips causes his cock to rub against my G-spot. Stars burst behind my eyes. Everything else just floats away until I’m left teetering on the edge, so very close to ultimate euphoria. He knows I’m close and chooses that moment to slow down. I don’t even realize I’m groaning in protest until his chuckle fills the room. “Patience, love. I’ll get you there.”
He will.
He always does.
Harrison adjusts our position, spinning us around until I’m straddling him. He knows. He remembers. This has always been my favorite position. He thrusts his hips upward, robbing me of any ability to think or speak. “Work with me, Winnie. Take control,” he whispers, gripping my hips in his big hands and hanging on tight.
I start to move, up and down, rocking my body and taking all of him. He’s so deep, so big, so… yeah. My movements become more frantic. He holds on firmly, no doubt going to leave fingermarks on my pasty skin. I’ll wear them as a badge of honor, though. I always have.
Before too long, my desire takes complete control. I’m there, ready to detonate like a bomb, and I can tell by the tightness around his mouth and the way his Adam’s apple bobs that he’s there too. The need to come is too great, and I’m not strong enough to deny it anymore. My hips gyrate as I slam back down on his cock, my body jolting as the release starts.
“Winnie,” he grunts, watching as I implode around him. I think I say his name, but I can’t be sure. I’m not sure of anything right now except the way he makes me feel.
Familiar.
Harrison’s fingers grip and dig into my flesh as he holds on, thrusting his hips upward and finding his own release. Our gazes never falter as we both come, the sounds of our orgasms filling the room in song. I memorize everything about this moment because when it’s all said and done, and he leaves as planned, I want to think back and recall just how explosive, how magical we were.
When I’m boneless and gasping for air, my body falls forward. His arms instantly wrap around me, holding me firmly against his broad chest. The afternoon sunlight filters through the open blinds, and I’m not really sure what to say. Maybe there’s no need for words. What more could possibly be said that hasn’t been hashed out over recent months?
I instantly relax, listening to his heartbeat and his breathing evening out. Something that feels like regret creeps in. This was definitely a bad idea. The waters have been muddy between Harrison and me for a while—months, even, before the separation—but the one thing that has always been right has been this.
This.
So, for now, I ignore the tinge of regret that’s waiting in the wings and allow myself to find refuge in his arms. As I lie here, it’s that comfort that lulls me to sleep.
Chapter 3
Harrison
* * *
It's been two weeks since I made the biggest mistake of my life. Two weeks of wishing things were different. Two weeks of wondering how to change it, how to go back. As I sit here at my desk staring at the piles of paperwork I need to sift through, I can't seem to find it in me to do it. I love this gym. All Fit is my passion. I never dreamed when I started working here right after college, that I would someday be the owner. I've busted my ass to make it a success, and I've done that. I'm in the process of opening two more new locations, and all my hard work has paid off. Except for one small detail.
I lost my wife.
Biggest mistake of my life.
Some might say the mistake is sleeping with said ex-wife on
the day of your divorce, but any amount of time with Winnie is never a regret. Before that day, it had been months since I'd touched her soft skin, tasted her sweet lips. Sadly, it had been even longer since I'd been inside her. It's not something a man ever forgets, but the memory of making love to her is nothing like the real thing.
We're still explosive together. I guess you have that with years of familiarity under your belt. Although not everything was familiar, such as her bare pussy. Rage had hit me when I thought she’d done that for someone else. It's the same exact rage racing through me just from the thought that another man gets to touch her. Could be touching her. "Fuck," I mumble, shifting in my chair to adjust my hard cock. That's something else that will never change, not when it comes to Winnie. Just thinking of her has me hard as steel. It's been that way since the day I first laid eyes on her, and I imagine it will be that way until the day I die. She is my Winnie, after all.
She used to be mine.
Balling my hands into fists, my eyes focus in on the W tattoo, a constant reminder of the failure I am. I couldn't keep her happy, and this job was the reason. I didn't put her first, but in my mind, I was doing just that. I was securing us financially for the future, for the family we never got to have. I let myself get zoned into giving her the world, yet lost her in the process.
I miss my wife.
I miss her with an ache deep in my soul. I fucked up, and I don't know how to fix it. I've tried to call her a couple of times since D-day, with no answer. I've sent text messages that have gone unread. I've done everything but show up on our— I mean, her doorstep. Picking up my phone, I pull up my calendar to see what day it is. They've all become one big blur these past two weeks. My chest literally hurts when I see the reminder for today.
Three weeks until Winnie's birthday.
I was so busy last year that I didn't remember her birthday until the day before. I rushed out to buy her a gift, ended up with a necklace, a heart-shaped pendant that apparently, she already had. In my defense, I never pay much attention to those kinds of things. Not when I can stare into those green eyes of hers, or run my fingers through her soft silky hair, grip her ass… You see where I'm going with this. I should have paid more attention. So I added a reminder starting today to alert me once per week until the day is here. Never again did I want to fail her like that.