Now I feel guilty.
“For the record, this?” Daniel says, shaking his head and doing the cut-it-off neck-slicing motion with his hands, “means no, stop, don’t, that sort of thing.”
“I can’t say no to your mom,” I tell him, like he’s crazy.
“I do it all the time.”
“She’s your mom!” I say. “I can’t say no. Besides, everyone’s coming, Eli’s cooking, it’s gonna be a whole thing—”
“Eli always cooks,” Daniel points out. “And everyone comes all the time.”
“Sorry,” I say. “I spazzed.”
“It’s okay, I just gotta tell Rusty first,” he says.
Of course. Rusty. How could I forget?
I wait a beat, putting my phone back into my pocket.
“The truth?” I ask, softly, and he nods.
I bite my lips together.
“I can’t lie to her about this,” he says, and I nod in agreement.
I don’t love the idea of entrusting this enormous secret to a seven-year-old, but I hate the idea of telling her that I’m going to be her stepmom only to take it back in a few months.
“I gotta get to work,” I say, gesturing at my car.
“Me too,” he agrees.
Then he pauses and just looks at me, his eyes searching my face, and I look back. He’s dressed casually today — jeans and a Loveless Brewing t-shirt — but he’s still astonishingly handsome, tall, built, and intense. I swallow, momentarily lost for words.
I could pretend to be attracted to that, I think.
Pretend?
“Charlie, thank you,” he says, his voice low and quiet, pitched so that only I can hear. “I know this isn’t ideal, but… thanks. You’re a lifesaver.”
Daniel makes it easy to smile, and I do.
“You’re welcome,” I say, and gather my courage.
Then I walk up to my fake fiancé, put one hand on his arm, stand on my tiptoes, and kiss him on the cheek, my heart beating like a flock of starlings.
His skin is warm under my lips, his short beard surprisingly soft. He smells a little like shampoo and a little like something sharp and earthy.
Then it’s over, and it was no big deal except my whole body feels like a live wire.
“See you tonight,” I say.
His other hand skims my waist as I step back.
“See you,” he echoes.The moment I pull into the driveway, Daniel comes out of the house. By the time I’ve parked he’s walking toward me, the gravel under his bare feet not bothering him in the least.
“I’m not that late,” I say, getting out of the car. “It’s like five after six.”
“It’s ten after, but you’re fine,” he says. “I wanted to prepare you.”
As if on cue, Eli’s girlfriend Violet opens the screen door, waves, then walks back inside.
“She knows,” Daniel says, his voice low. “Her, Eli, and Levi… found out.”
“You told them?” I ask.
“No, they’re a bunch of nosy assholes,” he says.
“Language,” I tease, and Daniel rolls his eyes.
“Rusty’s inside, she can’t hear me. I told her today. She was kind of confused, but I sold it to her as a fun pretend thing that we’re doing, and I think she’s on board for now,” he goes on. “My mom, Seth, and Caleb don’t know.”
“Yet,” I say, still looking up at the big house. We start walking.
There’s something on the small of my back, and it takes me a moment to realize it’s his hand, just barely brushing against me, like he’s guiding me up the driveway.
A slow, warm tingle travels up my spine, from his fingers to the nape of my neck. It’s nice. This is nice.
I ignore it.
“Yeah,” he agrees, his voice low and slow. “I see Seth every day at work, and Mom… you know how she is.” he mutters.
“You mean, ‘possibly psychic’?” I ask.
“She’s not psychic,” he says. “She just pays attention.”
“So this secret is just between us and four other people, one of whom is in second grade,” I say.
“Right.”
“What could go wrong?” I ask, rhetorically.
We reach the porch steps. Daniel’s hand is still there, on my back, and I’m doing my damnedest to pretend that this is perfectly normal, that I’m used to his light, strong fingers guiding me, that this has been happening for ages now and somehow, no one else has noticed.
Then Daniel stops.
“Charlie,” he says, my foot on the bottom stair. “Hold on.”
“You need a minute?” I ask, stepping back. I couldn’t blame him if he did. The Loveless clan is delightful, but they can be intense.
“Sort of,” he says. He takes my hand. “C’mere.”
There’s a half-smile in his eyes that matches the one on his lips, and he tilts his head slightly to one side. I raise an eyebrow and let him lead me away from the porch steps, around the side of the old farmhouse that’s been in his family for generations.
Surrounding the house is a strip of grass, then the forest. He leads me in on a barely-there path, and even though now I know where I’m going, he doesn’t let go of my hand.