My eyes narrowed at the question.
“I’m not challenging you. I’m just curious. What’s special about her that you can’t find with another woman? I’ve never been in love or felt anything remotely close to that with someone, and I’m starting to get closer to thirty than twenty…”
I tried to think of the best way to explain it. “I was fooling around Fleur for a long time—”
“Fuck…she’s so hot.” He rolled his head back and rubbed the back of his neck.
I gave him a cold look.
“Sorry,” he said quickly. “You were saying?”
“She used to drive me up the wall because she was just too much. But I kept going back…over and over. And then when I met Emerson, all that stuff started to feel really empty. It actually made me feel worse. I just…needed more. She gave me everything I needed without even touching me, and I just had to be with her. There was no other option. The idea of going back to Fleur or whoever…repulses me.”
He nodded slightly, like he wanted to understand but just couldn’t.
“You’ll get what I’m saying someday.”
He gave a noncommittal shrug. “Maybe. But I’m really happy for you, Derek. You seem like you’re in a really good place, and that’s nice to see. And she seems cool. Mom and Dad obviously love her like she’s already part of the family.”
“Thank you, Dex.”
He raised his beer. “Cheers.”
I smiled then tapped my bottle against his. “Cheers, man.”
We both took a drink before we set down our bottles.
“So…you think you’ll ask her to marry you?”
I shrugged. “I’m just enjoying what we have for now.” Being in a monogamous relationship was easy. It was no struggle at all to commit to one woman, to lose all interest in other women because there was no comparison. Fleur was younger and more attractive by societal standards, but Emerson was truly beautiful, from her head to her toes, from her skin to her heart. My heart beat only for her. But the idea of planning to get married again, that sounded like a nightmare. And having kids… She knew how I felt about that. I tried not to think too far ahead because it made me uncomfortable.
“She’s your age?”
I nodded.
“She’s probably going to want to have kids soon. Something to think about.”
I stared down at my beer for a moment before I lifted my gaze again. “She already has a daughter.”
Dex was visibly stunned, judging by his stillness. He didn’t blink, his eyes didn’t shift, and he took a few seconds before his body stopped being so rigid. “Oh…I didn’t know that. How old is she?” He lifted his beer to take a drink.
“Twelve.”
He nearly choked on the drink and turned his face into the crook of his elbow to cough a bit.
I’d been expecting that reaction, so it didn’t surprise me. I drank my beer as I waited for him to return to calm.
Dex finally got himself together and stared at me. “She has a twelve-year-old daughter?”
“That’s what I said.”
“And…that doesn’t bother you?”
“No.”
He did the math in his head. “That would mean she was—”
“It doesn’t matter, Dex. Come on, don’t be a dick.”
“I’m not. I just couldn’t imagine being a parent right now, and I’m a lot older than she was at the time.”
“Shit happens,” I said with a shrug.
“I’m just surprised that doesn’t bother you. You went from young models exclusively to a thirty-year-old single mom…”
“She’s twenty-nine. And I’m almost thirty-one, so she’s my age.”
He raised both hands. “Derek, stop being defensive. I’m not judging her. You just dropped a ton of information on me in a single day, that’s all. Last time we spoke, you were partying every weekend with women like Fleur, and now you’re in a very serious relationship with a woman who has a kid… It’s just a drastic change. I already like her, and not because she was cool, but because you love her—and that’s all that matters to me.”
I relaxed now that I had my brother’s approval, and that was when I realized how much his opinion meant to me, even though he was younger than me. It somehow meant more to me than the opinion of my parents.
He lowered his hands and grabbed his beer again. “Are we good?”
I nodded.
“Geez, take a chill pill.”
“You prescribe chill pills to your patients?” I countered.
“I wish I could sometimes.” He drank from his beer. “So, what’s she like?”
“The daughter?”
He nodded. “You guys get along?”
“I haven’t met her.”
Dex did a better job of hiding his reaction this time.
“Her name is Lizzie, and I’m going to start tutoring her. I wasn’t sure when I would feel comfortable meeting her, but Mom suggested helping her with math and science since she struggles with it. And since that’s something I’m good at, I agreed it was a good idea. Lizzie doesn’t know I’m seeing her mom.”