“My friend from way back when calls to check on me before my own husband,” I muse with annoyance as I finish drying off and begin digging through my suitcase for something to wear.
“Rose, you pulling this running away crap is really immature and selfish. You owe me a huge apology. As you know, I have to be up early. Goodnight, Rose.” Brody’s voice was louder than the other messages and his annoyance palpable.
“Immature? Selfish? Were you even listening to a word I said?” I argue though he’s not there to hear me. Checking the time again, I know I won’t catch him before he’ll have to be at the stadium for the pregame warmups and practice.
I put on a workout outfit so I can go to the gym and work out the aggressive frustration I’m feeling.
When I come down from my room, my mom takes one look at me, and I swear she knows everything. The woman always could read me like a book.
“I’m gonna hit the gym. I’ll see ya later,” I say, thinking the walk to the gym will probably wear me out before I get there, but it’ll be better than getting a ride and having my mom or dad fire questions at me about my marriage the whole way.
“Hey, Rose petal,” my dad calls after me.
I turn back. “Yeah, Dad?”
He tosses me his keys and tells me, “Take my old truck. It’s been needing someone to drive it and keep the motor alive.”
“Thanks, Dad.”BrodyI sucked in practice and left the field early to get to my phone before the other players started coming into the locker room. There aren’t any text messages, but I’ve got a new voicemail, and the relief that flows through me gives me hope that Rose will say the right thing like she always does that’ll put my restlessness at ease, and I’ll be able to play.
“Hi Brody, I know you’re probably not going to hear this until you get a break before the game, and I’m sorry I missed your call last night. Anyway, I want you to know that I’m not running away. I’m being selfish, yes, you’re right. I lost myself following you around on the road. I’m not doing anything; I’m not accomplishing anything. I need to remember who I am and acknowledge my own hopes and dreams… ya know?”
My heart hurts at the sound of Rose’s voice and the sadness in it. “You said we got married really young, and you’re right, we did. Maybe we should’ve taken a step back a long time ago and figured out if what we want is what we both want.”
I don’t like the sound of that.
“I love you, Brody. I know you love me too, and truly, I’m so proud of you. You’re making your dreams come true, and I know you’re going to keep going and keep making them come true whether I’m there to watch or not. Have a good game tonight and be safe. Sorry this message is so long. Love you. Bye.”
My shoulders feel heavy as I stare at the picture on my phone that comes as her caller ID.
“Don’t worry, dude. It gets easier,” Kaden says when he finds me staring at the picture of my wife.
“No, it’s not like that. I was just thinking,” I say defensively.
“Sure,” Kaden says with a snarky smile.
I want to argue with him and tell him that Rose and I are nothing like what happened between his wife and him. I would never cheat on Rose. Never. We’re going to get through this. I have no doubt how much I love her and how much she means to me. I’m not going to let her leave me. That’s not even an option.8RoseI look around Get Fit, hoping that I’ll see my old friend Chrissy. She owns the gym, and I always loved spending time with her, but after asking at the front, I find out that today is her day off. I haven’t seen her or her daughter in a long time. As a matter of fact, I’ve only seen her once since her divorce, and that’s just one more thing to add to the ever-growing list of things that I feel bad about.
Regardless, I get to work, and it isn’t long that I’m pushing myself harder and harder. I do thirty minutes on the elliptical, and I can feel the way my muscles are already hurting and the way I’m breathless that I’ve been neglecting my health also. It seems I’ve let more things fall to the wayside than I was aware of.
Working out has always been therapeutic for me. The workout feels great; it gets my blood pumping and gives me time to think. Once I got past thinking about Brody and the voicemail he left for me, I finally get around to remembering what my goals were when I was in school.