“It’s all I could find out there, but if you pee in this, we can just stick the test into it to get the result.”
Taking it from him, I looked from the tube to him and back again. “How the shit am I meant to get it in here? It’ll go all over my hand.”
Shrugging, he backed away and made a shooing movement with his hand. “You can wash it afterward. Just pee in it already.”
We’d been together for over six years now—married for five of those years—so it was fair to say we’d witnessed the other one at their worst. I can’t say I’d pooped in front of him, but I’d been sick, he’d helped me when I caught a stomach bug, I’d helped him when he’d caught it from me, it had all happened. That magical curtain that shielded each other from peeing and pooping had disappeared, but peeing in a tiny tube while he stood there?
Wasn’t I suffering enough?
“Just pee, baby,” he sighed, turning his back to me and staring at the wall. “I’m not looking.”
Bending forward, I held the stupid thing under me and peed, squealing when it went on my hand. “I would strongly advise you to make sure there’s a shit ton of soap available, Parker.”
“There’s soap and hand sanitizer, baby. I’ve got you.”
It’s fair to say most of my pee went on the thumb and forefinger that were holding the tube under me, but amazingly, I managed to fill it almost to the top.
Not saying a word, I held it out to him and reached for the toilet paper, shuddering when I wiped my hand with it first. By the time I’d tidied myself up and washed my hands with soap four times, he was standing looking at the plastic tube on the counter.
“What does it say? If it comes up with something demonic, I don’t want to know.”
Almost like he was in slow motion, he turned his head to look at me with tears in his eyes. “We’re having a baby.”
The last time I’d seen him so emotional had been when I’d finally found the ring he’d hidden in a cake. My brothers had convinced him to do something they’d seen online and get the ring baked into a cake for my birthday. The point was to wait for each slice to be eaten and the ring to be found, so it was meant to be just the two who ate it. Then Dale had come to drop something off, and I’d insisted he have a slice, so it was his tooth that’d found the ring. One awkward drop to the knee proposal with a cake covered ring and a crown for Dale later, and we were engaged.
Now, this was the next phase of our lives together—a mini version of both of us mixed together.
Throwing myself at him, I kissed him long and deep, the excitement suddenly almost overwhelming me.
I was so caught up in it and trying to convey how happy I was that I didn’t come up for air until a foot started kicking the door.
Opening it, I saw my family all crowding the small room with huge grins on their faces. Apparently, the walls weren’t as thick as I’d assumed, so when one of them had come in to check on me, they’d heard the news. Did I mind that they’d told everyone before me? No. The most important person to share it with had been in the room with me when I’d taken the test. Coming out to find everyone else ready to celebrate and congratulate us just made it even better.
As it turns out, my pregnancy was a walk in the park. The sickness only lasted a month, I breezed through each check-up, the baby was slightly small, but that only meant good things for my poor vagina. When I went into labor at thirty-nine weeks, it was long, but I gave birth to our little boy with no problems.
The only issues came when we had to decide on a name. We hadn’t found out the gender of the baby while I was pregnant because he’d been too wriggly and hadn’t wanted us to, but even if we had, I reckon we’d have struggled to decide because we had five names for a girl and another five for a boy.
“What about Tobias?” I asked after we’d vetoed all of the names. None of them seemed to fit him, so I’d gone online and looked up ‘rare boys names,’ and this one had stuck out.
“I love it, but on one condition—we call him Tobias Townsend Knight,” Parker whispered as he walked slowly around the room with our little boy in his arms.
Like I was going to argue with that!