“Jessica?” He knocked on the door.
“Go away … or come on in.” She sighed as he opened the door.
“Do you really have a phone call to make?”
“Yes. But God’s busy right now. His mother/secretary, Mary, took a message. I’m sure he’ll call back later.”
“Do you want to talk?” He sat in the chair he’d been in that morning with the pool stick.
“Not really. Do you?”
“I think we should.”
“Fanflippentabulous! You go first.”
“You’re angry.”
Jessica sat up, pulling her knees to her chest. “You’re judging me.”
“I apologize. You’re right, that wasn’t fair.”
“Why did you want me to believe you had a lunch date when in fact it was your sister?”
“To see how you would react.”
She closed her eyes. “It was a test?”
“Jessica—”
“Did I pass?” Her words were slow and sharp.
Luke leaned forward resting his elbows on his knees. In casual clothes and his hair sporting a slightly-ruffled look, he had the appearance of a normal man capable of speaking uncensored words that hadn’t gone through some politically correct filter.
He looked at her and she waited and waited.
“Sorry, Jones, I can’t understand you, probably because I don’t speak mute. So I’ll just go while you make sure all your words are lined up in perfect order. I don’t really give a damn if I let a few escape that haven’t been given much actual thought. Sometimes emotions matter more than the right words, and if you overthink every goddamn word it’s like suffocating it until all the emotion is gone.”
She swallowed and took a deep breath, still riding that wave of courage. “I thought it was sex, you know? I haven’t had it in … forever: ten months, two weeks, one day, and a few hours. Yes, I’m counting.”
Luke’s attention jumped from the floor to Jessica. She returned a one-shoulder shrug.
“But even after you assured me we would never have sex, as in less than zero percent chance, I still wanted to be with you. And maybe it’s because I can tell you anything, even if I haven’t told you everything, but it feels like something more than that.”
Jessica ran her fingers through her hair. “Does the thought of you on a date with someone make me jealous? Yes. Do I know that some completely put-together girl is going to steal your heart someday? Yes. Does it crush mine? Absolutely.”
She bit her lips together until her eyes blinked back the impending tears. “Am I aware that no matter how brilliant and talented you are I will never be completely right … normal?” She nodded as the words broke from her throat.
Luke would never give her normalcy. At best, he’d give her acceptance.
“You two coming?” Tom yelled from downstairs.
Jessica stood, blotting the corners of her eyes. “Good talk, Jones. Good talk.” She grabbed a hoodie out of her suitcase and slipped it on.
“Jessica?” Luke grabbed her wrist as she walked by him.
“Don’t.” She gave him a sad smile. “You don’t have to say anything. Think of everything I just said as off the record and … forget about it.” She pulled away and headed downstairs.
*
Miles of glassy water under a blanket of stars greeted the Jones family as they all boarded the two-story house boat.
“Are they setting off fireworks tonight?” Lara asked.
“Yes. In about thirty minutes,” Liam answered. “You’re going to love this.” He rested his hand on Jessica’s shoulder.
She smiled, pulling the sleeves of her hoodie over her hands. “I can’t wait. This house boat isn’t too shabby.”
“Our dad bought it at an auction, then completely refurbished it.”
“I’m looking for a sailboat next. You should come help me work on it, Miss Fix-it.” Tom wrapped his arm around Jessica’s shoulders and gave her a squeeze.
“Sure.” She forced as much enthusiasm into her response as possible, knowing it was probably her first and last visit to Luke’s parents’ place.
“There’s drinks and snacks inside and chairs on both the upper and lower decks. Feel free to look around.” Felicity tossed an armful of blankets onto one of the chairs as everyone else crowded inside to grab drinks.
“I’m going to take a look up top.” Jessica pointed toward the stairs.
The view was picturesque from the top deck. Lighted boats dotted the water like glitter and some of the most magnificent homes Jessica had ever seen framed the nearby shores.
“Wine?”
Jessica turned. Luke stood behind her holding two glasses of wine.
“Thank you.” She took one and watched him with a suspicious eye as he sipped from the other. “What are you doing?”
He swallowed, rubbing his lips together. “What do you mean?”
“I mean the wine. You don’t drink wine.”
“Sometimes I do,” he replied, each word slow and laden with so much meaning … so much intention.
The patient that wanted to be nothing more than a woman—his woman—stared at him. It had to be a joke, another test.
He took her glass and set both of them down on a small table.