“Come on. She asked me not to. And in my defense, when she told me I couldn’t tell you, I said I wasn’t comfortable. Then she said she would tell you soon, so I caved. She was a wreck, man. She needed someone.”
“It’s fine, Tucker. I’m teasing.”
“Good.” He brought the beer bottle to his lips and took a drink. “So…you doing okay with it?”
I nodded. “I’m fine. Really.”
“Really?” he asked in surprise.
“I mean, my very first reaction was a bit negative, but once she told me herself—”
“Told you herself? As in, you already knew?”
“Yeah…I figured it out.”
“I guess that makes sense…since you’re a doc.”
“Anyway, when she was in tears over my reaction, I remembered Cleo was nothing like Valerie, that this was a genuine accident, and that I loved her with all my heart and having another kid is a blessing. I had a change of perspective on the spot, and I was actually excited about it. I’m still excited about it.”
“Well, that’s great, man. I was worried.”
“I’m guessing you put those thoughts into her head?”
He shrugged in a guilty way. “I told her there was no way to know how you would react. You react to things differently from other people. You take longer to move on from stuff…”
No wonder she was so terrified. She’d had a bag packed in the closet like she’d expected me to throw her out on the street. She acted like it was the end of our relationship, when it was only a new beginning.
It made me feel like shit.
I should have been comforting her, taking her stress away, making her feel safe and protected…but instead, I was making her miserable. Leaving her for two months was the biggest mistake of my life. Letting her live in that shitshow of an apartment for a month was my biggest regret. Of course, she was fucking traumatized.
But at least that was behind us now.
“You been to the doctor?”
“We went this afternoon.”
“And?”
“He said everything is fine. The baby is healthy and doing well.”
“You know if it’s a boy or girl yet?”
“She’ll be at three months next week, so we can find out then if we want.”
“Do you want to?”
I shrugged. “Doesn’t matter to me.”
“How does it not matter?” he asked, cocking an eyebrow.
“I mean, I don’t care if it’s a boy or girl.”
“You have no preference?”
I shook my head.
“Does she?”
“Not sure. But I doubt it.”
“Are you guys going to keep living at the condo?”
“You ask a lot of questions, man.”
“Well, you’re the worst conversationalist,” he said with a laugh. “You don’t just talk about your life. You have to be asked.”
“I assume we would stay at the condo. Derek’s school is nearby and Cleo is going down to part time once the baby is born, so it’d be easier for her to live in the building. And for me, I don’t really care where we live. The condo has enough space for four people.”
“What about five?”
“I say we just focus on four for now…” Two kids was perfect, but Cleo might want to have two of her own. We hadn’t really talked about it.
“You going to ask her to marry you, then?”
I shrugged.
“What kind of answer is that?”
“It’s kind of personal.”
“Asking my brother when he’s going to make his pregnant girlfriend his wife?” he asked. “It’s not that personal.”
“We’ll see what happens.”
“Because she might be expecting it now that she’s having your kid.”
I shrugged. “She doesn’t strike me as the kind of woman who needs a husband to have a baby.”
“You know what I mean, Deacon. I just think—”
“Tucker, I appreciate your concern, but this is my relationship. I will ask her when I want to ask her, whether that’s this weekend or years from now. When the time is right, I’ll know.” I wanted it to be private, to be special. Tucker had known she was pregnant before I did, and the hints he’d dropped were obvious. People didn’t know how to keep a secret. As far as I was concerned, this was between her and me…nobody else.
Tucker raised his hands in surrender. “Alright…I’ll back off.”
I came home late that night. Replacing Dr. Hawthorne was time-consuming, because there were a lot of applicants whom I’d rejected in the past though were good contenders, but they’d already accepted other positions elsewhere. So now, I either had to start over or wait until a later time to find a new member of the research team.
When I got home, Derek was already in bed.
It’d already warmed up considerably, even though it wasn’t spring yet, so I hadn’t worn my jacket. I left my satchel on the entryway table and went into the kitchen. There was a plate of leftovers in the kitchen, so I reheated it and leaned against the counter as I ate it. When I finished, I left it in the sink and headed to the bedroom.