“Well, why don’t they stay here with you? Then all of us can go—”
“Mom,” I cut in, “Sage and Keller start school in four days. They need to get back to Oceanside.”
“I don’t see why you can’t at least fly back. You’re not ready for a drive that long. You just gave birth, for goodness’ sake.”
“Iris can’t be around so many people yet. Her immune system isn’t ready for that.”
“Well, this is just ridiculous,” she huffed, zipping one of the suitcases closed.
“Hello, hello, hello!” Anita called, walking into the room. “So you’re really going, huh?”
“Yeah, we’re going to leave in the morning. Early. Hopefully the kids will sleep the first couple of hours,” I replied, wrapping my arms around her and dropping my forehead to her shoulder. “I’m already exhausted.”
“I bet. How’s my baby doing today?”
“Awesome. Dad’s got her in the living room. I think he and the kids are watching a movie.”
“Uh, Dad and the big kids were walking toward the creek when I got here.”
I looked at her in confusion and moved around her, making my way out of the room and down the short hallway to the living room. When I got there, my heart thumped hard in my chest.
“I would have stolen her from Dad,” Anita murmured, patting me on the back as she passed me.
Shane was sitting in my dad’s recliner, and on his lap was Iris—completely unwrapped from her blanket and partially stripped of her clothes.
“I’m sorry,” Shane blurted as I moved closer. “I was trying to follow your lead, but I—I just wanted to hold her.”
“Is there a reason she’s half naked?” I asked quietly as I reached them.
His face reddened as he began to clumsily press her feet back into her pajamas. “I just wanted to check things out. Count toes and all that. I hadn’t really had the chance to…Well, I hadn’t gotten a good look at her yet.”
I watched but made no move to help him as he buttoned her back up, misaligning the little snaps and having to redo them twice. He wrapped her up like a pro when he was finished, and as he pulled her close to his chest, I sat down wearily on the couch behind me.
“You hadn’t held her?” I asked softly, watching him gently rub her back.
“I didn’t think you wanted me to—”
“I don’t mind.”
“Thank you. I just miss so much with the kids, you know?” He glanced at me, and I nodded. “I don’t want to miss anything else if I can help it. She’s been right here, and I didn’t want to piss you off, but I wanted—I needed to hold her. She probably doesn’t even know who I am.”
“She doesn’t know who anyone is. She’s four days old.”
“She knows who you are,” he argued.
“That’s because I have the goods,” I said, gesturing at my chest.
“No, she knows your voice and your smell. She instantly calms down when you have her. It’s the coolest thing I’ve ever seen.”
“You have four other children, that’s not a new phenomenon.”
“I know,” he said softly, meeting my eyes. “Gunner did the same thing. The minute you had him, he was happy.”
“Sage, Keller, and Gavin were that way with Rachel, too.”
“I guess I wasn’t paying attention.” He gave me a sad smile and shook his head. “I didn’t pay attention to a lot of shit I should have.”
“You had a lot going on.”
“I’ve had more going on in the last two years than I’d ever had before, and I still know the exact moment you walk into a room. I saw every time you blew a raspberry on Gavin’s belly or helped Sage do her homework.”
“You were just more aware of things because—”
“I can’t keep my eyes off you,” he filled in before I could say another word.
“Auntie Kate!” Sage yelled as she burst in the front door. “Keller fell in the creek!”
“Son of a bitch,” I mumbled under my breath, standing up. “Where is he?”
“Grandpa’s taking off his clothes outside since he’s all muddy.”
“Okay.” I turned to Shane. “You’ve got her?” I asked, nodding to Iris.
“Yeah.”
“Then I’m going to run a bath for Keller. He probably has mud everywhere.”
Shane gave me a tender smile and a nod before turning toward Sage, who was trying to get a good look at Iris. I didn’t know what that smile meant, but I didn’t have time to mull it over. Keller ran into the room in his underwear, his face and arms covered in green slime and a huge smile on his face.
* * *
Late that night, I sat nursing Iris while Bram paced the floor and Alex kicked back in our dad’s recliner.
“This is bullshit, Katie,” Bram hissed. “You shouldn’t be driving all the way to California—especially with that prick.”
“He’ll be careful,” Alex drawled, taking a drink of his beer.