And she prayed Abby would love her when she learned she wasn’t her biological mother. No matter the genes, Raine loved this baby more than anything in the world. And she’d do everything in her power to give her a life full of choices and opportunities...not demands and expectations.
“So you think Marshall has run back to your dad, yet?” Max asked.
Raine cringed. “I have no doubt he was on his cell the second he got back into his truck. But who cares? My parents don’t control me.”
Moving around Max, she took Abby and laid her back down in the Pack ’N’ Play pen with her favorite stuffed cat. She turned back to Max and sighed.
Now that the damage was done, Raine could only hope the news of Hollywood’s hottest bachelor playing house with her wouldn’t hurt this drawn-out adoption process.
“My parents have never been happy with my decisions,” she went on. “Finding both of us half na**d is nothing that will disappoint them. I’m almost positive I’m at the bottom of the list for Daughter of the Year, anyway.”
Max eased down on the edge of the bed and stared at her. “I know your father barely mentions her, but, surely they love having a grandchild.”
Raine shrugged. “I’m sure they do in their own way, but they’ve already asked if I’ve put her on the waiting list for the private schools because so many of them are years to get into. They can’t believe that I’ve considered homeschooling.”
Max rested his elbows on his knees and continued to study her. “So they want to control her?”
“The way they couldn’t control me,” she confirmed, rubbing her arms. “I won’t let it happen. Abby will make her own path in life, with my guidance, not my demands.”
“You really are a single mother,” he murmured. “You have no one to help you.”
Raine lifted her chin. “I don’t need any help. I sure as hell don’t want help in the form of control.”
“Good for you,” he stated. He reached out, took her hands and pulled her toward him. “But that has to be hard on you...being alone, doing it all. Is Abby’s dad nowhere in the picture? Surely he could give financial support.”
Raine shook her head. There was no need to get into the whole backstory of Abby’s life. If she and Max could work through their past problems—and that was a big if—then she would come clean about everything. And that meant both babies.
“It’s just me,” she reiterated. “But we’re making it work. And as soon as I get back to a heavier volume of work in the spring and summer, things will really look up.”
The way he studied her made her nervous. She didn’t want him to dig deeper into her life, into her closet of skeletons. He would only end up more hurt, and she couldn’t do that to the man she loved.
And she’d never blamed him for deserting her when she was pregnant...because he had had no clue. But she had blamed him for killing their dreams. Now she knew the truth, and the guilt consumed her for hating him all these years.
“I’ll pay to have your furnace replaced.”
Raine jerked her hands from his. “Like hell you will! I’ll pay for it. We’re okay right now as long as my firewood holds out. These old stoves heat really fast. I should have enough wood for another month anyway. Plus that space heater downstairs didn’t do too badly.”
“So what will you do when the wood runs out if the weather is still cold? You know the East Coast is finicky.”
Raine shrugged. “I’ll figure out something. I always do in a pinch.”
“Why not just let me help?” he asked.
Raine glanced over at Abby who was waving her little arms and sucking on a stuffed cat’s furry tail. “Because you’re here for a short time.” She turned back to him and offered a smile. “And I won’t always have someone to come riding to my rescue.”
“Because you won’t let them or because you are alone?”
Why did he have to put things into perspective so simply?
“Both,” she replied honestly. “I’d rather do things on my own than pretend to be someone I’m not just to have the help and support of my family.”
“What happened to all the money you got when you turned twenty-five?” he asked, then shook his head. “I’m sorry...I shouldn’t have asked that. I’m just surprised that you’re struggling when I know you had a good chunk of change coming your way.”
Raine backed away from him and moved to the dresser, pulling out a pair of black yoga pants and a sweatshirt.
She didn’t care that he watched; she wanted to get dressed so she could start her day, and then he could be on his way since the roads were clear. They both needed time to think about the past...and the future.
“My parents had that little rule changed when I rebelled and decided that the money could be mine, provided that I adhered to their ‘simple’ guidelines.”
Max’s brows drew together. “They kept the money from you? That’s...archaic. Why did they do that?”
She pulled out a pair of heavy socks and yanked them on, as well. “Because I loved you, because I planned on leaving and because I ran into some...trouble when you left.”
“What kind of trouble?”
Oh, no. There was no way she could get into that conversation. Not after they’d succumbed to passion so many times over the past two days, and not when her heart was starting to gravitate toward him again. She had to steel herself. There was already way too much hurt hovering between them.
“We’ll save that for another time,” she promised.
Max looked as if he wanted to say more, but he merely nodded.
“I need to get some wood, feed the chickens and the goats.” She grabbed a ponytail holder from the top of the dresser and pulled her hair into a top knot. “You care to watch Abby for a minute?”
He glanced over and nodded. “She seems harmless, but, if I smell something, I’ll let you know.”
Raine laughed, grateful he didn’t push the issue. “Thanks. I’ll hurry.”
“Watch that one goat,” he called after her. “He likes to get all up in your business.”
Raine laughed and headed out of the room. Max was starting to enjoy it here. He hadn’t said so, but she could tell. After only two days of living in her crazy farm-girl world, Hollywood icon Max Ford was comfortable, content and liking it. He smiled, he opened up, and he even let down his guard.
If the paparazzi got wind he was here, they’d be all over him. Raine giggled as she went to the back door and shoved her feet into her rain boots. The paparazzi at her house would seriously tick off her parents, and, if she was a teen again, she’d so be calling the media, but she was a mother and an adult. Pettiness had no place in her life.
And there was no need in starting any more fights than necessary, though she knew her mother or father would be calling shortly to confirm that Max had indeed been stuck here.
As she stepped off the back step, Bess and Lulu came through the weatherproof rubber flap and ran out to her, the chickens following behind. She nearly tripped but caught herself. She loved her life, loved raising a garden, loved her chickens and goats, loved her home that needed more repairs than she knew what to do with, and she loved being a mother.
The adoption progression was beyond frustrating, but her attorney had assured her everything was fine, and sometimes the process took longer than others.
So, now Raine played the waiting game...and tried to figure out just what to do with her heart and Max Ford.
Eleven
Abby started fussing; and Max tried shaking her stuffed cat, holding up another toy that had tag things all over it and even a silky blanket. Nothing was making her happy. And she wasn’t in full-fledged-crying mode with the red face and snot, but he seriously wanted to avoid that type of confrontation.
So he bent down into the Pack ’N’ Play pen—he thought that’s what Raine had called it—and picked Abby up. Instantly she stopped fussing.
“Are you kidding me?” he asked her.
Drool gathered just below her bottom lip and slid down her chin, and Max wasn’t repulsed. She was so damn cute he wanted to squeeze her. He refrained, but held her against his chest, inhaling the sweet scent.
He’d worked with babies on a couple of films, but his actual interaction with them was slim because the mother was always nearby, and once the scenes were shot, the baby would leave.
Max took a seat in the chair closest to the fireplace. He’d be kidding himself if he didn’t admit that seeing Raine as a mother clenched his heart. They’d had the perfect life planned for themselves, and kids were a huge part of it.
As he looked at Abby, he realized her features were nothing like Raine’s. Where Raine had soft green eyes, Abby’s were dark brown. Raine had pale skin and Abby’s was a bit darker.
Apparently she took after her dad. And Max hated the man...a man he didn’t even know. But how could Max resent a man for making a child with Raine? Raine was a victim just like Max. They’d both moved on as best they could once their lives together had been ripped apart.
Abby squirmed a bit on his lap, so he sat her on the edge of his knee and bounced her. “I’m not sure if I’m doing this right, but if you start screaming, I guess I’ll know you don’t like it.”
Raine’s cell chimed from the dresser, and Max nearly laughed. He had no doubt that was either Raine’s mother or father calling to confirm that their daughter had a sleepover.
Who the hell took away money rightfully due to their child? Not only that, who kept it when there was a baby in the mix?
Max had no idea really what to do with Abby, so he came to his feet and starting walking through the house.
And there was no way he could let this furnace situation go. He’d already asked his mother who to contact, and she’d done some calling of her own to cash in on some favors. Raine could hardly argue once the furnace was paid for and installed.
“Your mama is stubborn,” he told Abby as they paced through the hall.
He stopped at the room where Raine had been making lotions and smiled. She’d been fiddling with things like that when they’d dated. She was always trying out some new homemade soap or making candles. She didn’t care that she wasn’t popular or that her mother’s high-society friends thumbed their noses at Raine. And that was one of the main things Max had found so attractive about her.
He wondered when she’d be making that visit to have a come-to-Jesus meeting with her parents. But he wouldn’t push. She needed to approach this in her own way, on her own time.
And he would be there to support her.
Figuring she’d be back in soon, he headed downstairs toward the kitchen. Abby started fussing a bit more, and he assumed she was probably hungry. Raine had given her a bottle somewhere around five this morning, but then Abby had gone back to sleep. How often did babies eat?
This parenting thing was beyond scary, but Raine seemed to know exactly what to do and when to do it. Were there books? An instruction manual?
Abby started to squirm and cry. This was going to get ugly real fast if he didn’t do something. He prayed to God Raine already had bottles made up, because he’d only seen her make a few, and he had no idea how to do one himself. Sometimes she used goat’s milk; sometimes she used a powder and water mix.
He sincerely hoped there was goat’s milk in the fridge, because he had no clue the ratio for the powder and water, and there was no way in hell he’d be milking any farm animal. He’d risk the roads and hit the nearest grocery store first.
Max opened the fridge, saw two premade bottles, thanked God above for small mercies and grabbed one. Holding onto Abby, he pried the top off and quickly stuck the bottle in her mouth like plugging up a dam.
Blessed peace. He only hoped he was doing the right thing. He cradled her in his arm and propped the bottle up with the other hand. He paced around the room and from the wide window over the sink, he saw Raine go from the barn with the chickens, into the goat barn. She moved slowly over the mounds of snow, but she looked so comfortable in her daily chores. He couldn’t even imagine her trying to do all of this on her own, but she was managing somehow.
As he continued to feed Abby and pace, he walked by a small built-in desk area in the corner. Papers lay strewn across the top, but it was the paper tacked on the wall beside the desk that brought him up short. It was a court date regarding...custody?
Was she in some sort of custody battle? He glanced closer at the paper and noticed another name. Jill Sands.
Max drew back. Jill...as in Raine’s younger cousin? What the hell was going on?
He glanced down at the baby who had closed her eyes and continued to suck the milk.