For the first time since she’d moved in, she missed morning coffee with him. She decided to have it with Vanessa instead. They sat in the same coffee shop where she’d had it out with her brother.
Vanessa stirred her second sugar packet into her coffee. “So, let me get this straight. He gave you a ring for a fake engagement you agreed to and now you’re ticked off at him for giving it to you.”
Ellie had to admit her anger sounded ridiculous when her friend put it that way. “Please don’t make me sound like the unreasonable party in this.”
Vanessa held up a hand in mock surrender. “I’m on your side. Always.”
Silence fell over the table as Ellie tried to find the right words. She was furious and hurt. This dragging sadness exhausted her.
She hated that battered-from-the-inside gnawing sensation that overtook her when she thought about the ring and Derrick. She was not the crying type, but right now she wished she was.
She didn’t even know what to say to Derrick because he wasn’t wrong. She had agreed to the fake arrangement. It had just taken him longer to launch into this part than she’d expected. She’d hoped that meant something.
“It was the way he did it.” And that was true. Even a fake arrangement deserved some sense of importance. He’d handed her a ring without even bothering to open the box.
Thinking about it, reliving the moment in her head, had fury bubbling up inside her again. Really, the man was clueless.
“You’re angry because he didn’t get on one knee and ask you?”
Ellie didn’t like that question, either. “Maybe I’m not telling this story right.”
“Hey, listen to me.” Vanessa reached her hand across the table. “There is an obvious problem here.”
“Derrick.”
“Him, too. But I think the real issue is you’re in love with him.” Vanessa winced as she said the words.
“This is about the way he—”
Vanessa fell back in her chair. “Oh, my God. You didn’t deny it.”
She couldn’t because she was. Vanessa said the words and they didn’t sound wrong. The realization terrified Ellie. She’d tried to be smart and careful, but she’d fallen. It was stupid and dangerous and would likely break her heart, but it happened.
She thought the truth would hit with a jolt. Instead it settled in and snuggled around her. But she still wanted to throw up.
Rather than deal with any of that, she fell back on her anger. On Derrick’s depressing choices. The least he could do was fall with her.
“You don’t start a fake engagement by shoving a ring at someone.” How could she not see that? Ellie thought for sure she would get an immediate agreement on that topic.
Vanessa nodded. “Okay.”
“Stop smiling.”
“I should because I’m worried about you.” The amusement left her tone. “You changed the rules in this thing. You fell for him.”
“I thought… I mean, we’ve slept together.” When Ellie realized she’d yelled that bit of information, she immediately lowered her voice. “We’ve gone out on these dates. None of it feels fake.”
“Maybe that’s what the two of you need to talk—” Vanessa stopped herself midsentence then leaned in closer. “You’re not confronting this because you’re afraid the relationship didn’t change for him.”
Exactly. That was it. She should clear all this up. But what if the answer was something other than what she wanted it to be? “Maybe I should sell the ring and move to Alaska.”
Vanessa’s eyes bulged. “Wait, is that thing real?”
“He said it was.” Ellie studied it for the fiftieth time. It was stunning. Big. But not too much. A solitaire surrounded by smaller diamonds, and a perfect fit. She didn’t even want to know how he’d pulled that off.
“Damn. Go Derrick.”
Anger or not, the ring made a statement. “Right?”
“I’m going to give you some advice.”
Ellie didn’t hide her groan. “About shoes? That’s about all I can handle right now.”
“You need to end this.”
Her stomach went into free fall. “Did you miss the in love with him part?”
“That’s my point. You guys need a do-over. Start fresh and honest.”
“We’ve been honest with each other.” With a few false starts, they had made a deal. They’d both known, going in, what this was and what it would mean: solving problems for both of them and little more.
Well, damn. Vanessa was right. She was the one who changed the deal.
“Since you’re here and not with him, I think that’s not true.” Ellie started to talk and Vanessa talked over her. “You did storm out, right?”