“Okay, but—”
“I’m not saying that to make you feel guilty, because this wasn’t your fault, but being away from her didn’t make her safer.” Connor wound down long enough to exhale. “You’re not your dad.”
“I know.” For the first time, Joel believed it. Unlike his father, he fought for other people. He believed in people. He possessed a sense of humanity.
Hope had told him so many times. Having a woman like her love him should have clued him in. She wouldn’t waste her time on a dangerous loser. He got it now.
“No, you don’t, but if you give that woman a chance she’ll show you.” Connor’s comment came out almost as an order. “Be half as smart as I think you are.”
Cam nodded. “Or her father will kill you.”
“It doesn’t matter what he thinks.” It really didn’t. It was great to have his support and his blessing, though right now he was pretty displeased, but Joel didn’t need her father’s opinion. He had Hope and she believed in him, even when he didn’t believe. That meant more than anything else.
“Joel, come on.”
He held up his hands. It was either that or listen to these two try for the next two hours to convince him of something he already knew. “I’m saying that because I already know living without her isn’t an option.”
Cam threw up his hands. “There, was that so hard?”
“Actually, I think the hard part is ahead of him,” Connor said.
Cam barked out a laugh. “I hope she makes you beg.”
* * *
HOPE SLOWLY AWAKENED. She saw the white ceiling and heard the beep of machines. She closed her eyes and mouthed a little thank you. She wasn’t dead.
A deep male laugh had her turning her head. One she recognized and savored whenever she heard it. Joel sat in the chair next to her bed looking all rumpled and scruffy and far too delicious.
When their eyes met, he stood up and came to the side of the bed. Bending down, he slipped an arm over the top of her head. “No, you’re not dead.”
“You wouldn’t let that happen.”
“Never.” His fingers danced across her skin. “But we should really thank your quick thinking.”
That’s not how she remembered it. “You pulled me out of the fire.”
The memory played in her head. She’d thought it was some weird dream, but it wasn’t. His strong hands and words of encouragement. The firm grip and the gunshot. Her ears still rang from that, and a high-pitched ringing sounded as if in the distance. She knew from experience on the shooting range that that would eventually go away.
His fingers slipped into her hair. “You saved yourself. I was just there for the ending.”
The word cut through her. She closed her eyes to beat back the pain as a new series of memories hit. Him leaving and her crumpled in a ball on the couch.
“Hey.” His thumb rubbed over her forehead. “It’s okay. Charlie can’t hurt you now.”
He had the wrong nightmare, but she opened her eyes anyway. “Is he dead?”
“No.”
In a way, the news was a relief. She wasn’t responsible for killing the man, and this one would’ve been on her. No accident. She’d stabbed him and had meant to...and would do it again.
But the idea of him being out there and alive in society made her stomach twist. “Did you catch him?’
“Pretty easy to do after you hobbled him.”
She smiled at that. “I’m not sorry.”
“Me either. I just wish I’d been there a minute or two sooner.”
She wished he’d never left. Now that the thought was in her head, she wouldn’t think about anything else.
“Are you leaving?” The question burned her throat, but she forced it out.
Looking into those eyes, all soft and sweet as he stared at her, broke her resolve. She wanted to take back everything she’d said to him at the house and call him back to her on whatever terms he wanted. The expression was the very definition of love. She had no idea how this man could continue to bring so much pain.
“No.”
The word clashed with her thoughts. “What?”
“I’ve walked out on you twice.” He leaned down and placed a small kiss on her nose, then pressed one against her lips. “I’m so sorry I hurt you.”
Tears pushed at the back of her eyes. She refused to let them fall.
“You break my heart.” She had told him so many times how much she loved him. This time she wanted him to understand how much pain he inflicted.
“Never again.”
She tried to move her head, and the bed flipped around on her. Apparently she had a head injury. At some point she would have to take stock of all the bumps and bruises and figure out why her hip ached so much.