“I’m fine.”
Cam scoffed. “Yeah, you sound it.”
“How about if I punch you? Will that prove it?” Yeah, knowing Cam’s reputation Joel would regret it later. But blowing off some of the energy pinging around inside him would feel good at the moment.
“Go ahead. If that’s what it takes for you to get your head out of—”
Connor held up a hand. “Okay.”
“Are we going to talk or move?” Joel asked, hoping to get the conversation back on work and out of his private life.
Connor’s eyes narrowed as he assessed Joel again. “We’re heading in.”
“Happy that’s resolved,” Davis’s voice boomed over the mics they all wore. Tiny silver discs in their ears that kept them connected. They called it the comm. “For now.”
Joel remembered the entire conversation and swore under his breath. “How long have you been on the line?”
“We all are—me, Pax and Ben—and as the three members with women, we’ll talk to you about your idiocy later. Maybe let Cam knock some sense into you,” Davis warned.
And they would. Joel planned to dodge that meeting. “Lucky me.”
Connor picked up his gun. “Move out.”
* * *
HOPE HAD GOTTEN as far as her couch. She thought about taking a shower. Dreamed about crawling into bed and not coming out for months. Instead, she slouched down on the couch and curled into a ball.
That’s what you did when your world crashed down around you and scattered into a million unfixable shards. You cowered.
She curled tighter into a ball with her feet tucked underneath her as she berated the choices she’d made tonight. This time she had no one to blame but herself. She could have played the whole scene better. Waited until morning, after they had gotten some sleep and some distance from all that had happened.
She could have doled her concerns out in short bursts to Joel instead of laying it all on the line. So many decisions and all of them seemed wrong in hindsight.
The goal was to force Joel to step out of the blackness that surrounded him and into reality. Talk about a miserable failure.
For someone who insisted she didn’t play games, she certainly had done so tonight. She’d given him an ultimatum, something she vowed never to do again.
After so much death she thought he’d choose a life with her. At least fight back and insist they find a way, or that he have some time. But, no. He fell back on the old excuses and insecurities.
Her head dropped against the couch cushion and she snuggled in deeper. Her gaze fixed on a point above the fireplace. Not a photo or anything concrete. Just a spot.
She sat unmoving for what felt like hours. Her muscles ached and her head pounded from the crying. Her cheeks were dry now because she had nothing left. Not even the energy to get up.
Just as her eyes closed, she heard a gentle tap at the door. Her head shot up and she tried to remember if she’d set the alarm when Joel left...Joel.
The idea of seeing him, of him coming back, had her up and sprinting.
Somewhere at the back of her head, a bell clanged. All those lectures from her father about being careful. Joel’s insistence that her place be outfitted with the best security system on the market. The warnings jumbled together as she hit the foyer.
The green light blinked on the alarm, meaning she’d typed in the code at some point and turned it off. She pressed a hand against the door and went up on tiptoes to peek out.
The wood caught her in the forehead. A slam and a crack followed by a blinding pain and spots floating in front of her eyes.
Her body reeled back and her socks slid on the polished hardwood floor. She threw out her arms to catch her balance, but the move only made her more tipsy. The room spun and darkness closed in at the edges of her vision. She had to shake her head to clear out the ringing.
When she heard the soft click, she looked up. Charlie stepped inside and closed the door behind him.
He smiled. “You need better locks, but thank you for making my job easier and turning off the fancy alarm. That I couldn’t break. Well, not without some serious help.”
His presence was so out of context. She didn’t know what time it was or what was going on. “What are you doing here?”
He grabbed her arm and dug his fingers into her skin until she felt the bite and sting of his pinch and let out a soft gasp. She struggled to pull away, but he tightened his hold and started twisting.
“Good evening, Hope.” He dragged her in closer until his breath brushed over her cheek. “You and I are going to have a little talk.”
The rattling in her brain stopped long enough for her to blink out the cobwebs. “You’re supposed to be back at the campsite helping the police.”