He’d spent a lifetime bouncing around from obligation to obligation and hadn’t stayed anywhere for long. His upbringing had taught him to keep ties to a minimum and possessions to almost nothing. He’d tried to break the cycle, but since he didn’t even have a closet to his name, he’d clearly failed.
Still, the Corcoran Team had changed him, given him focus and a place. Connor set down enough rules to promote excellence and consistency but didn’t micromanage. That balance let Joel breathe.
In exchange, he filled any role the team needed. He honed his tech skills to make his work indispensable and spent hours at the shooting range perfecting his game. He refused to disappoint the members who had become closer than family to him.
Then there was Hope. She was everything he wanted. Smart, athletic, driven and fun. She didn’t get caught up in her father’s wealth and wasn’t impressed with fancy cars or the usual trappings. Her one weakness was for big comfy beds stacked with pillows. He smiled at the memory of the bedroom in her town house. A man could fall into it and get lost in the mass of blankets.
Of course, most things about her made him smile. She didn’t pester. She understood the concept of work secrets and didn’t push. Her easy acceptance had almost made it harder on him. He’d kept waiting for the bottom to drop, and the tension built with each day it didn’t. Another sick cycle he couldn’t figure out how to break.
“I can feel you staring at me.” Her sleepy voice floated through the room.
Even in the limited light he could see her eyes remained shut and her body buried in the covers. She claimed the whistle of the wind helped her sleep. Could be, but the humidity hadn’t faded and until it did he’d prefer to sleep without clothing, and that could not happen with her if he hoped to keep his “hands off” promise.
He watched her mouth curve into a smile and tried to cut off whatever was happening in her head to put it there. “You should be asleep.”
She shifted and made a sexy little grumbling sound. “With you.”
“Being even this close to you is killing me.”
Her eyes popped open. “Good.”
Funny how she liked that word, especially when she used it for instances he found to be the exact opposite of good. “Why?”
She lifted herself up on her elbow. “You should suffer.”
The words stung. They didn’t slice through him as they once would have, likely because of her softer delivery this time, but they bit. “Because I hurt you.”
She shook her head, and her hair fell over her shoulder. “Because you still are.”
Debating how far to go, he decided to give her the truth. Man up and take the deep plunge.
He leaned over and balanced his elbows on his knees. “You know I love you, right?”
“Yes.”
Her expression didn’t change, but he thought he saw a hint of satisfaction mirrored in her eyes. This woman... “That was easy.”
After a sigh, she rolled her eyes. Ran through the entire “men are clueless” list of gestures he’d seen before. “Joel Kidd, nothing about you is easy.”
Not really a point he could argue with, so he stuck with rubbing his hands together where they hung between his knees. “Fair enough.”
“Come to bed.” Her gaze roamed over his tee and down his bare legs.
He wore his boxer briefs and was ten seconds away from stripping them off. Which made his answer very easy. “I should ride out the night over here.”
Instead of taking the hint and gathering up the blanket around her again, she threw back the sheet and patted the mattress. “Do it here.”
He should have said no. Insisted they’d pushed their control far enough. He repeated that refrain as he walked across the room and slid in next to her.
The mattress dipped. Before he could think it through, he rolled her to her side and wrapped a hand around her waist. Her back pressed against his chest, and his nose went into her hair. “You feel so good.”
She brushed her hand across the arm banding her waist. “Go to sleep.”
“I have to go out looking for Perry and Mark tomorrow.”
She shifted until her hair hit the pillow and his body hovered over hers. “That’s too dangerous.”
“It’s what I do.”
She lifted a hand and skimmed her fingers over his cheek. “You could wait for the rest of your team to arrive.”
“Mark and Perry might need help and, if so, the clock would be ticking.”
“But you think they’re dead.”
He hesitated, but her clear eyes had him telling the truth. “That’s the worry, yes.”
Thundered cracked in the distance and rain pounded the window. Being out in this would be rough on an experienced camper. He doubted two soft businessmen with little experience were faring all that well. Which left Joel with no choice—he had to get out there at sunup.