I fit. It’s annoying that I fit.
I take a sip of my drink, mostly to give my hands something to do. It’s perfect, but then Tis made it. She’s the best bartender I’ve ever encountered, in my totally unbiased opinion. But thinking about her only makes me think about everything I’ve lost in the course of the last few days.
It’s time to stop dicking around and put some honesty on the table. I look up at Hook. “You’re using me as bait.”
He doesn’t blink, doesn’t lose that charming smile, but his body tenses the smallest bit. Confirmation, not that I need it. In the hours after the farce of a wedding ceremony, I had plenty of time to think this through from all angles. There’s only one that makes sense. Hook can’t find Peter on his own, so he needs to piss him off enough that Peter comes to Hook. He’s likely tried other things already, so he’s landed on me. He must have thought I’d say no if he told me the full truth.
Finally, he responds. “I’m using you as bait.”
It shouldn’t sting. I knew he didn’t practically blackmail me into marriage because he was overcome by love or some bullshit like that. This was always about territory and power. Everything in Carver City is about territory and power: claiming it, keeping it, taking out anyone who threatens it. It was never about me.
It really, really shouldn’t sting.
I take another drink, hating that my hand shakes. “Where he’s concerned, I’ve always been a big red button.”
“I won’t let anything happen to you.” Hook speaks so low, I can almost convince myself that I can’t actually make out the words.
“That’s not a promise you have any business making.” Bitterness creeps into my tone, a direct counterpoint to the sweet drink on my tongue. “It’s not a promise you ever had any business making.”
“I know you had no reason to trust me then, and you have no reason to trust me now.” I feel, more than hear, his exhale. “But you can trust me to keep you safe.”
At least he’s not pretending he doesn’t understand. I close my eyes and strive for calm, strive to keep the past in the past, locked up in the box I created just so I could get through my days without being a sobbing mess of trauma. “I don’t want to talk about then.” The before, when I couldn’t take tomorrow for granted because the threat of Peter hung over my head every second of every day.
For a moment, I think Hook will push the subject. Another of those long exhales and all the tension leeches out of his body. “One day, we’ll talk about what happened the night I offered to get you out of his territory.”
“No, we won’t.” There’s no point in pulling out all the wrongs done during those years and looking them over. Hook isn’t even the perpetrator, but he stood by and witnessed, which is almost as bad. I don’t exactly blame him for it, but I can blame him for the fact that the past is clinging to my back more fiercely than it ever has.
“Tink.” He practically purrs my name, a low grumbling sound that has me focusing on him completely. Just like that, the rest of it fades away, and there’s only this man who stares at me as if he can divine my thoughts right out of my head. He drags his thumb along my jaw to stop just below my bottom lip. “Would you like your reward?”
I reach for some attitude, but it slips through my fingers like water. I might be mouthy, but in my heart of hearts, I love submitting. I love the moment when I hand over control to someone who will give me exactly what I didn’t even realize I need. I love that I am never truly at their mercy because I will always have a fail-safe, and they will always respect it. At least here in the Underworld.
There are bad Dominants. There always will be.
Hook isn’t one of them. I hope.
“No, beautiful girl. Don’t get that look on your face.” He releases my chin and presses his finger to the spot between my eyebrows, smoothing out my frown. “Stay with me.”
I shouldn’t let him soothe me, no matter how good he is at it. But I am so goddamn tired. The events of the last few days cascade over me, and all I want is to forget for a little while. I press my lips together, clinging to my last bit of defiance. “I’m not crawling to you tonight.” Too late, I realize I all but admitted that I will crawl to him, will beg for his cock.
“I know.” His smile is nowhere near his usual shit-eating grin, but somehow it’s more genuine. “I have something else in mind for you.”