They had each other.
But they didn’t really.
She belonged to someone else and every time he held her or kissed her, he trespassed.
He eased back, setting her a few feet away from him.
She smiled sheepishly at him. “I’m so sorry.”
“For?”
“I panicked. I got emotional.”
He smiled ruefully. He didn’t want to remind her that this hospital probably brought back terrible memories for her. Instead, he directed the conversation as far away from Jason and her accident as he could. “I like that you’re emotional about my kids. It means you love them. It means they get the benefit of that every day.”
She shook her head, and smiled, then caught his gaze again. But after only a second, her smile faded. Her eyes filled with wonder, she put her hand on his cheek, feathered her fingers along his jawline.
It was as if she was seeing him for the first time. Or maybe realizing for the first time how close they’d become.
He held perfectly still. Didn’t even breathe. He wanted this woman so much that it hurt to even think about it. And he wouldn’t jeopardize what was happening right now by saying or doing something that would break the trance she seemed to be in.
She stretched forward and placed her lips on his. Softly. Easily. Then she pulled back, studying his eyes again.
He tried to tell her everything he felt without saying a word. That he needed her. That he loved how good she was with his kids. That there was something between them that should be explored.
But she took another step away from him and he knew that even if he’d gotten through it didn’t matter. She had commitments she wouldn’t break.
It nagged at him. As she slept on a chair in Sam’s room that night, Chance stood by the window, staring out. Snow twinkled in the streetlights that illuminated the cars in the parking lot.
He couldn’t figure out if Tory was being torn apart or managing to straddle two worlds. One world, her life with Jason, was sad. Probably empty. The world she shared with him was filled with laughter and noise.
He supposed they probably balanced out—for her.
For him, there was a perpetual what if. A promise of something wonderful that teased him, even as it reminded him there could never be anything more.
He walked to his chair, sat down and rubbed his hands down his face. The really sad part about this was he knew Tory’s loyalty to her fiancé was part of what drew him. Take away that loyalty and would she be the same woman?
Yes.
Because the time had long passed since her debt, her commitment, to her fiancé had been paid. And in his heart he knew that no man would want a woman to stand by his impotent body year after year to keep a commitment that could no longer be honored.
And the more he got to know Tory, the more he felt for her, the more he wondered if Fate hadn’t tossed her in his path to tempt her back to her real life.
Not that he thought he was any wonderful temptation when they’d first met. But what they had now was.
How could he tell her so that she’d listen?
They’d already had this conversation once and she’d blown him off.
Should he try again?
Or should he pray that what he’d already said would someday sink in?
* * *
They brought Sam home from the hospital the following day. The second they entered the cottage, Cindy began to squawk. Thinking she was tired of Cook and missing him, Chance raced over and took her from Cook’s arms.
But Cindy kept squawking.
Until Tory walked over with sleeping Sam.
Cindy patted his face and cooed and Cook gasped. “Isn’t that adorable? She missed him.”
“I never thought about it,” Chance said, as he held Cindy close enough to pat Sam. “But I don’t think they’ve ever spent a day apart.”
“She wasn’t fussy last night,” Cook said. “Slept like an angel. But this morning she was crazy.”
“She missed her brother,” Tory agreed. “But right now we need to get him into his crib.”
Chance caught her gaze. “Maybe we could put them down for a nap together.”
She smiled and nodded. “It would give them a sense of normalcy.”
They put sleeping Sam into his crib and Cindy in her crib and that seemed to be enough for Cindy who settled in to sleep.
Chance headed to the door but instead of following him, Tory took a seat on one of the rockers.
“Aren’t you coming?”
“I just want to sit here for a while.”
Chance sighed. “I know you’re tired. If nothing else your muscles are probably cramped from sleeping in that chair. Why don’t you just—”