My stomach turned, and a wave of nausea hit me. I got that he had been in love with her, but he had also been my best friend. Hearing he’d tried to talk Kaci out of marrying me almost left me feeling betrayed. “A mistake?”
Dirk didn’t look at me.
“Did she mean by marrying me?”
He finally met my eyes. “Nah, dude. I know she loved us both, but she loved you more.”
“And you loved her more.”
“We don’t know that.”
“You would have given up bull riding and stayed with her. Made the home she wanted.”
He shook his head. “She wanted you more than she wanted me. At the time it was hard for me to deal with that, and I feel bad about that, dude. I honestly do.”
I rubbed the back of my neck and sighed. “I knew how much you loved her, and I didn’t step aside. I wanted her too, and the thought of you having her . . .”
“Brock, it’s in the past. Let’s just leave it there.”
My chin wobbled slightly. “I loved Kaci.”
“I don’t doubt that. She picked you, and I tried like hell to accept it the best I could at the time.”
I looked away. My gaze landed on Lincoln. “I think I loved the idea of me and Kaci. I don’t know if it was the type of love needed to make a marriage work. I knew that, but I wanted her more than I was willing to let her go. I’m sorry I didn’t step aside.”
He shook his head. “She made the choice between us, and I know you loved her, Brock. Don’t try and compare how you loved her with how I did. It’s not going to make you feel any better.”
“I tried to make her happy, Dirk. Damn, I tried so hard to make her happy, but I always fell short.”
He nodded. “She knew what she was getting into when she married you. She knew how much you loved bull riding. Truth be told, I’m not so sure either one of us would have been able to keep her happy.”
Dirk’s words hit me so hard I took a few steps back. I hadn’t ever let myself think of it that way.
“Daddy! I won! I won!”
Blayze rushed back over to me with Lincoln in tow, skidding to a stop to say hi to Dirk.
“Hey, Uncle Dirk! Look what I won!” He held up a plastic cage that contained one lizard.
“Wow, look at you, winning a lizard. That’s pretty awesome, Blayze.” Dirk shook his head and laughed while rustling the hair on top of my son’s head. When he looked back at me, he nodded. It was his way of saying no matter what problems Kaci and I may have had, Blayze was a product of our love. There was no denying that.
“What do you think about our small town, Miss Pratt?” Dirk asked Lincoln.
She grinned. “Please call me Lincoln, and I love it! The mountains alone are enough to make a girl want to stay.”
Dirk laughed and then looked at me and winked. “I’ll let you guys enjoy the rest of your day. You going to the dance?”
“Yeah, we’re going to get something to eat, and then we’ll be heading that way,” I quickly said.
Dirk faced Lincoln. “Save this cowboy a dance, will ya?”
“Um, sure,” she replied, her cheeks turning a soft pink.
“See ya later, Blayze.”
“Bye, Uncle Dirk!”
A few friends of Blayze’s ran up to check out his new lizard. Before I knew it, plans were made to have a campout at Billy’s house.
“May I go, Dad? You can pick me up early in the morning, and we can go fishin’.”
With a grin, I leaned down and asked, “What about a bag with some clothes in it?”
“Hey, Brock!”
I glanced up to see Jan, Billy’s mama, standing there. “Hi, Jan.”
“I hear the boys are planning a camp-over.”
Standing, I blew out a breath. “I guess so. You sure you’re okay with it? We’ll have to run back to the house and pack him a bag.”
Jan waved her hand to dismiss that. “Nonsense. Blayze can just wear something of Billy’s.”
I smiled. “Oh, okay. Well, good. I’ll be by in the morning to get him to take him fishing.”
She nodded and peeked over to Lincoln.
“Oh, hell, I’m sorry. Jan, this is Lincoln Pratt. She moved here from Atlanta and is going to be working with Karen Johnson.”
“So, you’re the famous interior designer from the big city? Karen has been talking nonstop about you.”
Lincoln’s face flushed, and it was cuter than hell. She reached out and shook Jan’s hand. “Well, that is very sweet of her, but I’m not famous.”
“Bullhocky! I heard you designed the governor of Georgia’s country house.”
My head jerked to stare at Lincoln.
“Yes, that’s true,” Lincoln answered, her voice low.
“And Karen said you helped design the house of some famous actress . . . oh, what’s her name?”