He did it, then said what was top of mind before he thought better of it. “I’m not ready to share you. Maybe if we stayed in here a week—”
Like magic, her force field of aloofness fell away and a sweet smile appeared. “If these breasts were detachable, I’d send them ahead and have the driver collect the rest of me tomorrow.”
The medieval clamp on his heart eased. Her humor made it easy to amble across to smooth her hair off her shoulder and admit, “That was incredible. Thank you.”
“I thought so, too.” Her tiny voice tightened the follicles all over his body.
But the way she shyly ducked her head made this all feel too fleeting. He wanted this new circumstance locked into place. Couldn’t she see how simply right this was?
“We’re getting married,” he said with quiet assertion.
Sirena felt something in her ease. She’d been quietly fighting terror that paradise would swing one-eighty into hell again, but his arrogant order let her know he wasn’t planning to dump her as quickly as he’d seduced her. Still, she didn’t hear anything about love and that tightened her heartstrings to a point near breaking.
Reminding herself they’d come a long way and she shouldn’t expect too much, she said lightly, “Let me guess. I have two choices? Say yes now or say yes later?”
He blinked, not revealing what was going on in his quicksilver brain.
“Do you want to say no?” His instant air of detachment pushed her heart to the edge of a plank, but she supposed he could be having as much difficulty dropping his defense mechanisms as she was.
“No.” The word came out a bit forlorn. Never had she imagined marrying a man who didn’t love her, but if he couldn’t see himself having sex with anyone else, she couldn’t see herself marrying anyone else. There were enough bonuses to balance the limitations, she promised herself.
“Then it’s settled,” he said.
She bit lips that wouldn’t stop trembling.
They reached the penthouse and Ali eagerly perched across from her in the lounge, practically bouncing with excitement as Sirena sat down to feed Lucy.
“Well?” Ali demanded.
“Well, what?” Sirena asked, inwardly tracking Raoul to the bar.
“Oh, you’re hopeless. Raoul, did you propose or didn’t you?”
He paused with his glass half raised to his lips, gaze flicking to Sirena’s.
“We decided to marry, yes,” Sirena said with as little inflection as she could manage.
“I told you a man doesn’t go all out like this without a ring in his pocket. Let’s see it.” Ali clapped her hands then held them out, wiggling her fingers to coax Sirena to show her own.
“I—”
To her right, she heard the bottom of a glass hit the bar top with a firm clunk, but she refused to look in his direction.
“Sweetie, we have a baby,” she said to Ali. “Getting married is a formality. I don’t need an engagement ring for the few days it will take to get a license and sign some papers.”
“You’re not having a real wedding? But you always planned the full dress and fancy cake and Dad walking you down the aisle—”
“I was a kid when I talked like that! No, listen.” She hurried to forestall her sister beating this particular dead horse. “Dad and Faye have made it plain they’re not up to traveling and Raoul has lost a lot of time with Lucy coming early. It was very sweet of him to arrange for us to have this visit—” she made a point to let him see she was utterly sincere in her appreciation of that, but his inscrutable expression and unmoving stature cowed her “—but we don’t need any more disruptions,” she finished.
Ali didn’t want to let it go, that was her nature. She might be nineteen, but she was still a little girl in some respects. Sirena had grown up enough to realize you had to move past childish dreams and be realistic. She got Ali to drop it and Raoul left the room.
It was Ali’s last night, so Sirena wasn’t entirely sorry they’d been called back early. She settled Lucy, took off her makeup, then she and Ali had tea and talked about the stars Sirena had rubbed elbows with. Deep inside, she hugged close the secret of all that had happened with Raoul. Ali would never understand if she told her how far they’d come, but the closeness they’d achieved was huge. No brilliantly cut chunk of stone or fancy frock would ever mean as much to her as the way he’d held her as if he didn’t want to let her go.
It was late when they finally said good-night and sought their beds.
Sirena came up short as she found hers occupied.
Raoul set aside his tablet as she stopped inside her door. The lamps slanted golden light across his bare chest, making a relief map of his muscled shoulders and abdomen. She couldn’t decipher everything in his austere expression, but there was no mistaking the possessiveness of his quick glance from her lapels to her naked legs.
Tremendous self-consciousness struck. Playing with the tie of her kimono, she tried for nonchalance as she said, “I didn’t know you were waiting for me.”
“I was trying to fix that situation in Milan.” His scowl told her he was still trying. “I’ll give my schedule a hard look and figure out when we can get to Australia. Do you want to put off the wedding until then?”
“No,” she said firmly, hurrying to the bathroom to brush her teeth, hoping he’d take it as a signal to end the subject, but he didn’t. When she returned to the bedroom, he continued as if she hadn’t left.
“I’ve booked a jeweler to bring some engagement rings before we have to drop Ali at the airport.”
“I won’t wear one.” The words came out with more vehemence than she meant, but the sort of wedding she’d always dreamed of had been a celebration of love and this relationship wasn’t that soul mate connection. Yes, she loved him and he’d come a long way toward showing more than lust for her, but going through all the hoops and barrels of a big wedding would feel fake. It was vitally important they keep things as honest as possible considering their rough start.
He had one knee crooked beneath the sheet and one strong wrist braced on its point. “Do you intend to wear a wedding band?” His tone held a stealthy note of danger that made her tummy flutter.
She was shocked by how defenseless yet wonderful the idea of wearing his wedding band made her feel. An engagement ring was a romantic gesture; a wedding band was a lifetime commitment. Her throat thickened and she grew warm all over as she murmured, “Of course.”
Trying to cloak how disturbed she was, she clicked off the lamp and gestured toward the one on his side.
He didn’t move. “Why won’t you wear an engagement ring, then?”
“Jewelry with stones isn’t practical around babies. And—” She hugged herself. A tiny part of her still hated for him to think she was avaricious, but it was more than that. “I’m not interested in being a bride. I just want us to be a family.”
His unapproachable vibes dissipated. He reached to flick the sheet back, motioning her into the bed beside him. She hesitated, unable to be casual despite how intimate they’d been a few hours ago. He was naked and despite her exhaustion, she was dying to feel him against her, but shedding her robe as if they’d always been sleeping like this was impossible.
Amusement curled his masculine lips into a sardonic smile. “Really?” He turned away to click off the light.
“Don’t laugh,” she grumbled as the darkness made it safe to drop her robe and slide into bed.
Warm hands pulled her into contact with his hot, ready body. “I have better things to do than laugh, Sin.”
* * *
They married in Las Vegas on the way back to New York. Sirena made all the arrangements over the internet and this time, when they were given a shared room at his mother’s, she didn’t hesitate. Despite the perfunctory ceremony, the state of being married felt surprisingly natural.
They fell easily into old patterns. Within days of returning to London, Raoul had talked her into giving up her transcription customers and taking charge of his personal calendar instead. It came with an allowance similar to her old salary, which was rather generous considering her flat was paying for itself in rent and she didn’t have any other living expenses. Still, taking his money needled her. It would probably be healthier for them if she remained financially independent, but she accepted because she loved being part of his day-to-day life.
“And hire me a decent PA, would you?” he added as they finished up breakfast one of their first mornings back.
“Perhaps they have a two-for-one special at the nanny agency,” she mused, flicking the screen on her tablet, not looking up even though she was aware of him pausing after rising from the table.
“Do you think you’re funny?” he asked above her in the ominous tone that used to make her quake, but now made her grin.
“You just handed me a list that includes booking you a play date—” for squash, but she overlooked that “—and buying your mother a birthday gift. Throw in a nappy change and I’m spot-on.”
He was silent, then said, “This is the sort of thing you used to say in your head when you were afraid I would fire you if you said it aloud?”